Clinging on to the least hurt


And with more power, comes more havoc
And with more power, comes more havoc

This post has been on my mind for over a month now. I had some ‘low days’ while on vacation in Nice and finally got to identify this tendency of clinging on to the least hurt. I have even since then got worse days but I had already devised a plan.

Well, let’s start from the beginning as I share that particular incident which triggered my nerves and this post. In an earlier post about that very vacation in Nice, I hinted how I even dared to go into the swimming pool to take swimming lessons. It was a HUGE Feat for me and I was simply put – so expectant.

I needed to be reassured all the time, and I expected my Darling Darling who doubled as my swimming instructor to give me lessons whenever I wanted. I don’t know how to qualify my emotions, actions or reactions then, but some will wrongly call that ‘childish’.

It came to be that I got into the pool and waited for over 20 minutes while he played with his nephew. I was already depressed by then thanks also to my ‘feeling of not-belonging with the vacation clan’. I even wanted to leave because I really thought I didn’t deserve the treat after all.

The short of the matter is, because of that 20 minutes delay (which he struggled to explain was because he had to finish the game he had started since they had a deal), I lost my nerves and isolated.  I clung so badly to that hurt and the remaining days were simply a ‘turmoil’.

Something must be done

We simply can't - they are not friends at all
We simply can’t – they are not friends at all

This is why we have Psychiatrists, psychotherapists, therapists,  life coaches, counselors, support groups, hotlines and much more. I simply don’t believe in medications helping out here. Maybe they are helpful in some extreme cases say of very poor mental health, to stabilize the individual. But, I equally know all ‘good’ treatments for mental illness involve some sort of therapy

Clinging on to the least hurt, sparks countless other negative thoughts
Clinging on to the least hurt, sparks countless other negative thoughts

Taming the Demon?

Sometimes hard huh?
Sometimes hard huh?

I found this pic quote captivating. Many a times, it all has to do with our HISTORY. Our environment. Our Childhood and much more. Anger and negativity may have been much of what we grew up in and around. We may even have fared or seemed to be coping just fine, but a volcano was equally preparing itself in our psyche.

Therefore, we have some HUGE efforts to make. Even the least one, may be HUGE for some – but each little one, matters a lot. I equally came across a self-help book on:

Anger Management 101: Taming the Beast Within

,written by a psychotherapist by the name Ugo Uche. I am yet to read it, but I hope it reflects its title. I however follow Ugo on g+, and have exchanged some musings with him. Why not give it a try maybe?

Dear gentle readers and followers, mindful or mindless of my own mental challenges (which I am fortunate enough to be taming so far), I am seriously working towards becoming a personal and emotional well being coach of reference and preference. I know you wish me luck and I do wish you well too.

© Marie Abanga 2014

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7 thoughts on “Clinging on to the least hurt”

  1. “Many a times, it all has to do with our HISTORY. Our environment. Our Childhood and much more. Anger and negativity may have been much of what we grew up in and around. We may even have fared or seemed to be coping just fine, but a volcano was equally preparing itself in our psyche.”

    My past ruined my present and future my whole life. Only recently have I been able to push it away and let it flow over my head into the darkness behind me. I let it destroy me for over 50 years. . . so they won, didn’t they? Now, with what time I have left on this Earth, I have decided to take it day by day and enjoy as much as I can. And isn’t that a pleasant thought?

  2. This is a great post Marie and thanks for sharing it. I can relate to it. And I’ve allowed my past to take over sometimes. But with prayer healing is taking place and I’m now moving on. I know that it all takes times. But we’ll get there.

    It’s good to hear that you recognised the problem and addressed it. Well done. Have a good day. 🙂

    1. Thank you June,

      And after I get that ‘enlightenment’ so to speak, I always think it worth sharing alongside with some of my experience so that it makes it more helpful and real sort of?

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