I am done with all this rubbish


I am done with all this rubbish

So much rubbish to make me mad

Life seems so shallow

Screaming is all hollow

No one seems to care

Or is it we dare less?

The bills keep pilling

All keeps uphill

More dose & overdose

They exit this rubbish life

None seems to have any time

Even a dime is hard to get

Who is to blame?

Parents name governments

Governments name establishments

Children blame parents

It’s all so fake

Smells like stale cake

The circle and circus share same house

The mouse is just as mad

Get your ass off my couch

Pull it all together man

If you need another pill

Insurance will cover the bill

Yikes and yish am really tired

What kind of world is this?

We wait for graves to know

That needless was the race

In the now we fight

Showing off our might

What has love got to do?

No cares, maybe some do

We ain’t crazy its dem

Did I show u any diagnosis?

Rubbish rubbish rubbish
P.s: Stuck in traffic, taking out my anxiety and mild frustration at the traffic and more via these lines

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When the Anxiety revisits…but now you have a plan


Hello world, funny oga anxiety is revisiting just as I finish my CBT diploma course where the last lesson was on anxiety and OCD…irony right? 

Let’s start from somewhere, why this unsolicited visit.

  1. I lost a very dear maternal cousin and near went all numb about it…that’s not usual me nor ‘conventional’ way of grieving out here…so am anxious something is wrong with me…
  2. I also lost a great uncle, my dad’s favourite uncle and the dad of two cousins I love so much…paternal side now…equally so touched, seem to reach out more here and story short…some internal and external conflict there with grieving and all…
  3. I have finished some work I wanted to before October ran out, but my work load seems to be piling and now I can’t even blog as I want or what I had anticipated… Anxiety, mild panic, stomach bubbles

My plan

  1. Am writing it all down and telling it gently off
  2. I am being authentic and vulnerable all the way and that’s ok
  3. What I have finished deserves a celebration, it was a tough 10  lesson CBT course which I covered in 3 months in addition to all other I do
  4. I will focus more on the positives and be ever grateful for all…the boys all did so well in school, I am making real and good friends, am entering a poetry competition and have put together the 10 poems required, am managingbto keep up with sports inspire of the mind tug of war… I have one of the best sisters in the whole wide world…
  5. I know many love me and look up to me, I deserve that and it is reciprocated
  6. I know the difference between who I was and who I now am…I have to consciously make the choice each day to remember, affirm and celebrate that…
  7. I will blog as I want in due time…am already doing my best and a break whether intended or not is still ok

Hence

Anxiety you can visit in my absence. If am home you can stay a while and then leave because I  don’t have patience for toxic folks and naysayers…

And you world, what’s your plan or experience with such ‘losers’ like Anxiety?

P.s: a few hours later you’re laugh at myself for almost going back home because I forgot to wear earrimgs…coming from someone who dfinitely cares more about how she feels than looks lol… That was anxiety trying to lull me back home hahaha