What do you as a Parent or guardian do in the following circumstances? My real life and tough choices…


Gaby will finish me

  1. You ask them kids to do their laundry on the veranda while you are in the kitchen. You get a call and when you turn round you see one of them like that. Your first impulse is to take a picture to immortalize the moment, then I flash-backed to my own youth and saw myself not even at home but in front of the school taps while everyone studied. I at least kept my panties on and I stopped doing that at age 7. He is 8 years. Some say I should skin him alive, others say to pray hard, others say to talk to or with him, and one laughs loud saying therapist heal your own son, there is likely some ADHD there. What you advice my gentle readers and followers?
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  3. You come back home and find some neighbourhood kids invited by your son to play baby football in your living room. You see proof of what he does with his exercise book sheets and how he treats his school bag all the time. Well, I let them play because at least I get to see him, he gets to forget about TV (not that I have any), and he develops camaderie and learns to lose without fighting. On the down side, they finish and leave all that paper and chalk drown on the floor for you and you get to shout out your lungs before order returns. What will you do gentle reader and follower?Gaby peeling peanuts for soup
  4. You grill groundnuts for soup and you give him to go out and peel them so you can make the paste. He does just that but he eats up near half of that. Times are hard and you were hoping the 2 cups you had could make a pot of soup to last 2 days fora family of four for lunch and supper. I have explained to him previously why he shouldn’t eat dem groundnuts. Well, I shrugged, and decided I was better off doing that myself next time unless I could give that to a bigger child. I explain to him again why he shouldn’t eat them up especially in tough times like these. Can’t recall if I was any better or worse at his age, or if anyone even gave me such a chore in the first place. And you?
  5. You are once again convoked to David’s doctrine school (just friday I was in his school) where he has accumulated three absences although he leaves home each Sunday morning for doctrine he himself chose to attend. He knew it was a three years program although he is by this second year already failing with his grades and attendance.What do you do? Beat him up, withdraw him or let him continue to do whatever he wants? I give him 200frs each Sunday and tbt am getting tired with the whole thing too. Yet, I don’t want to stop him from having or making that experience. Gaby didn’t opt for that, while Alain is already done with his from a school where he had only a year of doctrine. I give him some work as punishment when he returns, and ask him to write a 700 word essay about the whole saga not leaving out the resolutions. I can’t go and sit there with him and still get to do all I have to do with and for them…my me moments are near getting threatened completely lol;
  6. You have sworn not to buy flip flops again nor a pair of shoe before school breaks out. Yet you feel so sorry for Gaby who has no flops again Lord knows where each goes to, and his lone pair of Shoes already looks so haggard. I confess I recognize that child and the genes he inherited And so, .I decided today after laughing at myself, not to bother swearing any never again around. I consoled myself by getting a dark chocolate bar from the market. Chocolate indeed is an anti-depressant unless any proof to the contrary…

Dear Readers and Followers, some of my quirps and muse as a parent and single one for that matter… ever grateful for my support team and journey to holistic wellbeing via different mental wellbeing plans…Yes We Can…we always try to find the Fun in the dysFUNction… (thanks Linda for the inspiration)

Have a great week

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12 thoughts on “What do you as a Parent or guardian do in the following circumstances? My real life and tough choices…”

  1. If I was a single parent with two boys I’d probably be ready to pull my hair out… but as it is, I have no children, and therefore no wisdom to pass on to you. Sounds to me like you’re doing very well.

    1. Hmm Ashley, I got even three not two lol. I cut the hair off long ago because it was a trigger. Am trying my best I must admit, by Grace and lots of Support and love. Am ever grateful.
      On another note, please what was first thought which came to your mind when you saw my son’s picture without his clothes on? I will appreciate your candidness, thanks

      1. You may not believe someone PM me to say it was so gross and tantamount to propagation of pornography. They have no mental health challenge am aware; of so it’s me the weird one doing crazy by putting that picture up. I mean I recall doing this until age 7 in my own school and having only my panties on may even not sometimes. Were there any cameras back then, there may have been some pictures for nostalgia today. Thanks for helping see it is our perception that blur our journey here below most of the time. Hope you are much better darling

      2. Wow, can’t believe someone would say that. I ran around without clothes as a kid, and so did my brother. If there are adults that choose to sexualize that then that’s their own creepy problem. You (and your son) did nothing wrong. 💕

      3. I told them pretty much and asked if they could call social services here to report us. Well, it was fun seeing someone lose the whole point of my post and get a picture, so innocent and hilarious, get them over such an edge hohoho

  2. I have no advice, beyond putting the FUN in dysfunction… 😁 I am so relieved that my three children are grown! Hang on, the years will fly by before you know it, and your boys will soon be men.

    But in the meantime, it is not easy being a mother, especially a single parent. You ars doing a great job.

    1. Thanks Linda dearie, am hanging in here and so grateful for the Grace. I share more to inspire others and to let some know that beyond all the smiling pictures, reality has its own dysfunction lol

  3. I would sit him down when you have some quiet time. Explain how his body is sacred and private parts need to be kept private. Only to be shared when he’s older if and wanted in a loving relationship. Can you go to the Dr about it they may have some advice. Maybe he can have an area where he can play free with the soap if it’s the feel that he enjoys to express and be creative with. Also look up on the net some advice maybe I use google to ask so much

    1. Hi Louise,thanks for your candid comment. I chose to sit him down and talk with him and leave it at that. I don’t find any need for a doctor. I am not berating him so hard because I may not necessarily share the view that sacred means no exposure if you want (here I mean exposure even of dark little ‘secrets’of your past). If that’s an extension of his age, I hope he grows qucikly out of it. The last time I bathe infront of my primary school with only my panties on and my titless chest exposed, I was 7 years old.

  4. Regardless of where you live in this world, this type of story is a recurrent one. Children are NOT born with boundaries. They are CREATED by testing various adults patience in various settings. Parents wind up sharing the most time with children and therefore experience the highest percentage of testing from them. It’s not easy, but can ultimately be incredibly rewarding!!

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