Category Archives: Coaching and Training

I have been busy creating, and you?


This is very much needed in my country, and am ready
#IamMAGnectic

Hello all, pictures they say speak thousand words.

I hope you now understand how inspired+motivated I have been since the start of this year, bust especially since October when I joined SIWO (success inspires world). It’s like a 🔥 lit up inside me, and I rose like a Phoenix.

Many call me phenomenal, I have branded myself MAGnectic.

Be inspired+motivated in all your endeavours. Thank you for all the support you can’t tell how I love me this tribe.

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What could I have as personal feelback from the Leading Lady Conference???


The Leading Lady conference had as theme, Intentional Leadership. Leadership I know includes leading yourself (most vip) and leading others – be this at home, at your workplace, business place – church etc

I love learning even more than I enjoy sharing – and of course these come with or involve networking right? Can you do or partake in these activities without others?

I really appreciated the package they put together and the organizers themselves were so warm. I mean I got a call from the co-founder of the mother organization like 2 days later to thank me for coming and spreading the word like via my blog and other social media outlets. Never happened before.

Now, I am a very spiritual person, and anything spiritual catches my attention. Prayers for me are powerful, whether you admit it or not, it is different when you start an event with prayers (even a silent one or a hymn), than when you do not. I am talking about events like these, which are looking at the person and their spirit, and not one on politics, policies or outright glamour.

You have to be spiritual to live and lead intentionally. Well that’s how it works for me. I was so happy to attend a conference which put together and brought out all of this.

So for day one, we had some soul praise and worship – I mean live one and even a trumpet maestro. There was a warm welcome and a first presentation by the co-founder of the mother organization which I enjoyed. The 1st teaching session was on the power and importance of purpose by the one and only Frankie Powell – that man is spiritually fired up, the 2nd on handling life’s detours and the third on intentional living.

The breakout sessions were equally wonderful, sad I couldn’t be in all because they happened at the same time lol. I attended one just to hear that speaker life at last, and another one to learn from a young, dynamic and diverse business woman.

A big take home was the book I bought at the conference. I read it in one go on my return trip and hardly saw time pass (like we can right?). I have already written a brief review on facebook as follows:

Book Review: From the Past into a life of Purpose: A Tale of Four Women edited by Dr Madison Ngafeeson
Review Title: A Tale worth Telling
I was probably the first participant who paid for this book even while it was being launched. I already knew I was going to love every word in there and I was happy to have a book to read on my return trip to Douala the next morning. It was worth the 3000frs I paid and it made the trip pass in no time. Indeed I finished it as we got to Yassa. Are we concluding it was a captivating read?
I am an author, and not any simple type but one who writes more of memoirs than fiction or poetry. I know how tough a feat that is especially in a culture which still ‘values’ the adage ‘no talk bring man disgrace’!!! In this book made up of four tales worth telling, the authors ‘talk’ and I feel them. No shame I mean what is there to be ashamed of?
Let he/she who has never struggled in their lives be it with a relationship/several for some of us, be it with career paths, be it with socio-cultural norms and traditions which can leave you ‘finished’ before your own time, ah be it with just about any precept of life, let that someone pick the first stone.
I love the authenticity in memoirs, it takes work and nerves – no holding back or looking for characters to ‘dash’ them your tale – telling it as it is, as it happened and as we now look forward to.
That indeed is the whole essence of this particular commendable book. The past was painful in each narration, but life goes on and intentionally. All the stories have beautiful continuations because I can’t talk of endings…
I sincerely recommend this book all and sundry.

Sad for now the books are only sold in Cameroon and no online copies yet.

I equally sadly left before the closing ceremony because hmm, thanks to the infamous BMT aka Blackman Time, the conference ran late on both days. I didn’t therefore collect my beautiful certificate personally, but a friend did on my behalf and I got same from her 2 weeks later.

I gave them a 7/10 and was of the opinion when surveyed, that they organize one every year. It was indeed a wonderful investment in my personal growth and self love, and I got to be hosted in one home I so love and have the utmost fond memories of.

Wishing us all a wonderful weekend, full of some self care and all

And this is how it’s all being going down: P’s Night; LLC & co


I knew I was going to have a blast…I visualized one…I wasn’t disappointed…

I left my city of Douala with the very first bus I could find, having stayed up late at Barakah’s all white and glam Prisoner’s night (P’s Night).

With BB herself

I got to Yaounde and had some serious running around to do before heading for the LLC venue. I know I am a super organized chap and had already visualized all of that, so zoom zoom zoom here we came and hurray…just in time for the opening…

2 good days of networking, learning, sharing all in Amazing and Abundant Grace at the Leading Ladies Conference (LLC)…

And I did buy my copy hurray

I mean I am good to go on that vacation (hadn’t I even started?) and then show up two weeks later with GUSTO…

Dear gentle readers and followers, it has been one thrilling first half of 2018 gone and so much Grace has been involved… let me go rest my fingers and brain at least as much as feasible, and then see you by Grace come July 23rd. I will probably share more about the conference and all I learnt and felt on my return, I hope and sure imagine you understand my frame of body and mind at the moment hahaha

Leading Ladies like myself will be attending this groundbreaking conference…


 

Since I returned to my country in August 2015, I haven’t attended any conferences. Workshops or small gatherings yes, I even tried organizing some under the platform I launched called Inspiring Positive Actions Now, but it didn’t quiet take off. My dream on my return was to actually organize a mega conference for women dubbed “Women walking with stubborn but passionate faith”, I had started putting together a team and then all sorts of challenges came in and I prayed and let it go.

It can then be easily understood why I am so excited to attend this conference which I aptly qualify as ground breaking in this country especially in such difficult times we as individuals and the entire nation are facing. I think ladies above all will have to step in the gap to lead themselves and the country as a whole, through all the unrest we are going through, be it spiritual, emotional, mental, physical, socio-cultural… you name them…

I mean, just read their vision:

The vision of this conference is to bring together 500+ women leaders and those involved in leadership in order to encourage, nurture and strengthen leadership abilities by engaging them through capacity building workshops, teaching, motivation and panel discussions on issues that affect women and their leadership in the society. The ultimate goal is to see these conference attendees empowered to carry out their God-given assignments in the home, workplace and world.

And yes, I went to school with some of the ladies profiled as authors, speakers or organizers, so it’ll be so much touching soul base for me. The Lord is really good all the time. If I cannot accomplish something and a sister or brother can, trust me I’ll join them and cheer them on and make some real noise and impact. I wish I could bring someone else, but you know in matters of the soul, your soul must be stirred from within and nothing else. All else will be glam which will backfire in the long run big time.

The conference is put together by an organization called Lead Mission International and their programme shows they’ll be organizing similar stuffs in Burundi too. Isn’t this simply awesome? This is the first of such conferences they’ll be organizing in Cameroon, and although I have a feeling nothing will be easy for the organizers especially with meeting set targets, I hope they brave through it all, counting on no other Grace but the most Amazing one provided by the almighty God and Father Himself. I can’t wait to meet the organizers in person and see what lies ahead in terms of collaboration, learning, sharing and more.

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I plan to get a copy of the book because I can see my story in there though not included lol. I will be meeting the editor myself and as an author, I am super excited. Who knows if he’ll take on my next publication? That project from every indication has a course I don’t master because each time I try telling my spirit I want to let it out now, am reminded patience is a virtue.

All in all dear all, I already feel it in me it wouldn’t be an idle weekend. I have a very soulful event on the eve of the conference in Douala and I blog on that in two days, then I leave the very next morning for Yaounde where the conference takes place, and will return to Douala on Sunday by God’s Grace. I am bundling all of this into a Me Moment because on my return, I may be alone at home (guys should hopefully be gone on vacation), but I have to resume psychology studies and writing my draft for next year. Any leading lady in Cameroon wants to attend, please call any of the numbers on the flyer and pay a sum you wouldn’t regret spending on your personal growth because YES – YOU DESERVE IT

Have a great week everyone

My once in a life time opportunity at the lone Psychiatric Ward as a clinical psychotherapist


 

 

Hi World, when you dare to follow your passion, with persistence and perseverance, it is a deep sense of fulfillment all the way – all the time. I bash you not but I am learning, loving and sharing so much in this once in a life time opportunity at the lone psychiatric ward in our city of Douala, Cameroon.

Needless to scare you with grueling details on say the numbers we receive each day, the number of shrinks available leaving out anything psychologist or therapist… nor the condition and resources of the ward… I got two months running from April 2nd – June 2nd 2018 and for that I simply put honoured, humble and happy. One of the first patients I saw wrote me a love letter on the eve of his departure and just yesterday another told me he was sad I was too beautiful for him. I mean isn’t this worth it?

You know, it wasn’t easy picking up psychology studies after I completed my CBT Training obtaining the first ever DISTINCTIONS note in my entire academic pursuit. But, and indeed, I was so motivated by this score and took an online diploma in psychology, dedicating close to 13 tough hours spread over two weeks, to have a merits score of 88%. Well there was lots of reading background too right? Anyway, below is what my records show:

Learner-Verification-Diploma in Psychology
Sharing just to inspire and motivate

I was now ready to for the once in a life time opportunity at the lone public psychiatric ward in my city, and considering the journey to get that opportunity, not even a nagging swollen eye nor any discouragement from ‘friends and foes’ could blur my vision.

I will just share a small portion of an email I sent to my soul family after two weeks at the ward:

April 20th: I call them my friends, I meet them before reading their records, most if not all have pure hearts marred by etc

Simply put, I am the first therapist seen there and I am fortunate to do it my own way. I am personal – calling names and not bed/room numbers; and I greeted and hugged a 19 year old girl and it meant the world to her. (She’s moved on to be my first ever private client, she is doing so well already and gladly her meds were revised … to read she’d been diagnosed with Schizrophrenia almost broke my heart)
Sadly, the meds culture is invading here and I have seen some zombies. But, many families don’t keep their patients here for more than a week because they don’t have money.
There is also quiet a high amount of addiction cases and I have already met and still work with 3 of them. Sad too many of their families have abandoned their patients and either care very less about them.
I generally see patients first and connect before reading their records, most records are filled with so much negativity and bias and bring out all things violent or pointing to need for incarceration and fierce treatment with ‘no mercy’ anti psychotic shots like haldol and valium oh my…
I take it in strides and many love me, indeed the lone bouncer there has started calling me to help him calm difficult patients ha. Some patients outright ask for me and some nurses too are not so pleased. But I go there only 3/week and the Major and Psychiatrist love me so and are so grateful I am there.
I mean, why would I pass on such a once in a life time opportunity to make a huge difference in my life and those of all these people hurting and suffering from all these debilitation, marginalization and stigmatization like my brother had, just because I am initially a lawyer and from a ‘noble profession and background?’

 

I have never doubted the intelligence my Almighty Father gave me. It is simply awesome all I sponge in, do, learn, love, share and embrace. No turning back for me, I embracing it all – all the way. His Amazing Grace is sufficient for me.

Gaby draws for a client

The boys are so proud of me and ask about my day. I tell them about my friends and sometimes they draw for them like Gaby did above for anty Love – she treasures that drawing and shows it off to everyone lol

Now, have you ever heard of an intern having an intern? Nadege above is a psychology major student who was sent to me on May 15th to train for two weeks before I leave. Here is a flash from our first day together. We took some pictures as she requested, and when she sent same to me, we had the following exchange (shared of course with her permission):

[14:08, 5/15/2018] Marie Abanga: Thanks for the pictures darling. Ravie de travailler avec toi (saying am happy to work with her)
[14:29, 5/15/2018] Nadege Psy: Don’t mention. Me too fière de bosser avec toi. Cette journée à été formidable (saying she is so happy too to work with me, and the day was a blast)

Our office is a hospital room, and we sometimes make a weary client to lie down for 15 minutes to the sound of some meditation music etc… we are out to help our friends as best as we can and am so happy to say I can give myself a 65% reach out. I go for walks with any I think need a walk or have that hot energy to burn out, I sit wherever with whoever, pray with them or sing or even just stare, hold hands, it’s all my spirit leading me. And it has indeed so done, I mean look at what one could manage to write on a worksheet I gave him

Another one who initially told me they don’t speak English, now greets me each morning as follows: “Hello lovely…” He gave me the large chocolate bar in the picture… many have given me little stuffs too, and it’s all so warm…

Be inspired and motivated with that passion and vision of yours regardless of your current circumstances or who says what around you. There is no doubt my just ended spiritual journey has fortified me bigtime for this once in a life time opportunity…

Happy midweek to all

Their Budding Bicycle Business and Co


When Alain was 9 years old and asked for a bicycle, I quickly got him one because I remembered how he loved his tricycle as a kid and will carry David behind as the zoomed the house. I had left Cameroon when he was 8 years, and was still dealing with so much guilt. Anything he asked for (given that I had easier access to him and barely any to his brothers), I quickly bought.

That was how he quickly learnt to ride his bicycle at his granny’s, and became the ‘chef du quartier’ par excellence (translate this as neighbourhood hero by popular acclamation lol). He always had what I call 12 disciples following him around, negotiating for even only 2 mins on the bike. We don’t have a bike culture here, and most middle or struggling families can’t afford the luxury of buying bikes for their kids, not to talk of each kid having their own lol

So, I got one for Alain, and when his brothers started visiting, they’ll learn how to ride on his bicycle. Their dad the ever his type, refused to get theirs for different reasons. He said they’ll run into the road when I offered to send the money to buy them…his first reason had been he had no money…

Anyway, fast forward to 2018 of course, we now have 3 bicycles for three guys in another neighbourhood like at granny’s. David of all, the one his dad feared for most, is the chief errand guy in the area. He flies on the bicycle, he rides almost standing, and does business with his bicycle more than the others.

They (except Gaby oh lol) ride their bikes to school too, and that spares me some change for taxi etc. It gives them so much autonomy and empowers them, they even give me some coins every now and then. They are fast learning to save and manage their finances and I couldn’t be more proud and grateful.

Alain is now with his 3rd bicycle since then, and he takes immaculate care of his bicycles. David does too, Gaby is just Gaby.

The chain is still on this time around lol

He puts the chair and chain on each time hahaha, but he still has some clients too; just for smaller amounts like 25 frs a ride or even a mango in exchange for some time on his own bicycle lol.

Alain bargains the most and he is big guy now right, so his own generation use the bike for more serious reasons like going on a date etc. One paid 500frs just last Tuesday for 3 hours. You can bet he needed that bike, maybe to go impress a chap lol.

I also seize the opportunity to continue teaching them to save and manage their finances, save also for when the bike breaks down and a wheel needs air for example. Alain and David have been doing that so well, Gaby is still trying to get that right hahaha. They even try fixing it themselves sometimes too and from them I have learnt some parts of a bicycle like the chain, brakes, nodes etc

Talking about business further, David is what we call a real Bamileke man (These are like the super business minded in matters of business in our country – a tribe renowned for being business inclined and with all the pride we can give them). He also has a sticker business. Stickers are called ‘autocolants’ in French, and he gets a packet of say 20 at wholesale price, then retails them for a profit.

The small downside of this business atmosphere here is that they tend to neglect other stuffs like washing their clothes. Nope I don’t do it for them, and nope I don’t have a washing machine, and nope I don’t have a housemaid.

So one day when I got back home and they had all gone out wherever, I didn’t want to raise my voice on their return – see am also fasting from anger and attack thoughts etc. I therefore left them a note on the kitchen door, and went to the nearby lake to read in peace. On my return, my obedient sons had done their laundry and we were all so happy. All is well that ends well, parenting can be fun if we are creative and let the children be themselves too.

Be inspired and motivated all you parents especially single mothers in here

Pray: How did you kick off this year?


I remember a similar post I wrote last year on the 1st of January. I was bent on that day to kick off the year with sports, especially given all the lousy reasons I came up with in the wee hours of the day not to do same. For me, it boils down to a good start because even if (and yes even when) I lose some momentum during the journey, I can always motivate myself with the memories of a good start – and obviously very good goals lol.

This year is a very special one for me because I was inspired to declare it My Year of Grace. I mean given the success of last year which I had declared My Year of Gratitude and got so much to be grateful for including a Guardian Angel when I had thought I was too old for one, I decided to believe in the power of my own inspirations. No need to go see any tarot readers, soothsayers, Men/Women of God … You name them. Let’s keep our fingers crossed for January 01, 2019 right?

Next special event this year, I formally began meditation and I mean serious ones with knees folded inside. So far I have been able to keep still and fold the knees in place for 10 minutes – don’t laugh give it a try and maybe clap for me lol. But hold up that’s not the goal of meditation oh, the sitting position and brain bushing around; it is the meditation proper, the passage you read and what you retain out of that and how that helps you through out the day.

Now, I needed to be alone in my home on January 1st this year because I needed no distraction whatsoever. I literally locked Ella out of the Gate and locked myself in my room. I had not one but three books I was starting with:

  1. A book of Meditations by the one and only James Allen

  2. Attitudes of Gratitude …by MJ. Ryan

  3. A Mini Course for Life by Jerry Jampolsky and wife Diane, of Attitudinal Healing International

Those three books and the whole meditation concept were offered me so generously by my Guardian Angel. Am I spoiled lucky or what?

After an hour or so meditating and listening to flute music, I went for a long walk and then visited different neighbours on my return. One of them even offered me a chicken drumstick to appease my saliva glands (some spicy odour in the different homes visited were already leaving my glands in a rage).

And so dear gentle readers and followers, I couldn’t think of a more serene way to kick off this 2018 with Grace. Gratitude goes on of course, it brings me so much joy I can’t leave that alone (I love saying all the thank you I can, sending the notes and sms and calls to near irritating hahaha). I hope the steam mustered on Monday 01.01.18 sees me through out the year. I merely turning 39 in 2 weeks time so I should still be good to go right?

Well, enough of me: please Pray gentle reader and follower, how did you kick off this year?

p.s: Will be away for a week or more as we lay my grandma to rest this weekend and retreat as a family for a few days. My two siblings are coming in and am excited to have the bonding time even if under such morose circumstances.

What I love most about teaching is: Empowering my students and learning from them


Soon I’ll have taught close to 400 masters students in my Country in barely 2 years and this is Amazing to me. The students always have so much in them and once I breakthrough, we stay buddies all through the course and after. I pride myself in knowning each person by their name. Am ever so grateful.

 

Newman doing his thing during class presentations
Hassana our HR Assistant
Lydie our Lady

Teaching my boys to save and manage their finances


The above picture was taken on Alain’s ( my 1st son on the right) 14th birthday last October 8th. We had been saving for months for a Chinese Buffet and it was going to be a first for them. No one took this lightly.

They’ve their banks crafted or bought by them, and we earn points when we save more. I have mine too and it’s so fun when at the end of a month, Alain has saved more than me lol. They get money from chores, gifts, pocket allowance and gigs around. Alain gives Gaby extra lessons for a monthly fee etc.
I think it is imperative they start learning now and not later. What you think world?

Israel my Adopted Son and Hero


With Israel

It’s a long story but I adopted Israel last year. He is such a cute boy and so wise for his 26 years. He is so talented too and just launched with 3 friends a platform called FundandImpact. I am in awe at God’s Amazing Grace in our lives.

FundandImpact allows the world to reach out and impact one life at a time by donating to help and contribute funds for solutions to the problems faced as raised in the campaign. The notion behind the initiative is that together a bigger and better impact can be created in the life of others when we consider a problem affecting one person – as a problem affecting us all.

He calls me Mom and we love each other unconditionally. The boys love their big brother who is so happy to be part of our family. Israel has come from so far, last thursday was the first time he visited our home in Douala. He is ready to move on and said: ‘Yes Mom now you can Blog about me’.

I will write more about the other start ups he is working on eventually, and will sure be creating a campaign on FundandImpact very soon.

Have a great week everyone