Category Archives: Journey to Coaching

Our real relationship MC & I (Clarity, Grief & Closure)


This weekend (her burial was yesterday); indeed since June 9th when My MC died, I have gone through a roller coaster of sorts with different emotions, some like pain and grief, plummeting so deep and others like sadness, staying there and keeping me alert and contemplative at the whole point of living.

Some even in my close family circles can’t understand why I should feel so deep and get involved so personal. I decided to just blog about it and get this clear and closed once and for all.

My father had lost his both parents by the age of 8, with his mother dying when he the last was barely 2. By age 12, he found himself in the town of Dschang in the Western Region of Cameroon, that is a 45 or so km from our village of Fontem found geographically in the South West Region. Dschang is French speaking whereas Fontem is English speaking. That was no hindrance for this determined orphan whose family couldn’t afford the 20.000 frs (20 £) school fees required for Sasse College where he had been admitted (one out of 5 only from Fontem). He decided to migrate on his own to Dschang and do all it took to work for his upkeep, master that French language and culture in no time, and pay his fees in one of the public schools which cost 1500frs at the time.

One day as fate and faith will have it, MC’s dad who was Divisional Delegate for Education at the time, visited the school dad was, overlooked into dad’s neat book, marveled at his meticulous handwriting and admired the way his hand shot up to answer questions or ask same. He decided that day he was going to adopt dad and sent a note to dad’s family to that effect. Dad told me he didn’t even send the note, he was ready to move in with one I fondly called ‘Grand pere’ the very next day lol.

My dad clearly owes just so much to this Angel, his family and all. Dad was taken in as a first child, and the couple later on had 8 children with MC being the 7th. Although nearly 2 years older, as I said I didn’t know nor could be bothered.

MC and I did stuffs teens (mischief ones especially) do, including talking about and exploring our sexuality. If that isn’t profound what is? When her dad my ‘Grand Pere’ died in July 2009, I was so heavily pregnant with Gaby I wasn’t even allowed to go into his room at the hospital to bid him farewell. He had insisted dad come in all the way from Fontem to Douala to see him and dad had picked me up on arrival so we go see him together. Shortly after dad arrived, ‘Grand Pere’ I was told looked at dad, nodded, touched his hand and then drew his last breathe.

I didn’t attend his burial either, Gaby was just a week old. Now, before this all, the last time I had gone to Dschang was when I was around 15 years. Life’s twists and turns came and we all went to town and life continued to happen. Keeping in touch was henceforth by phone etc.

3 weeks before MC died, Dad was in Dschang and I decided to go check on him. It was you can tell a soulful home coming. I still have to write about the visit. I prayed for MC on ‘Grand Pere’s’ grave but I guess the dice had been cast – she had endured too much already and couldn’t even talk… Am so glad I reached out to her that weekend with all the love I had and could show in my modest way…

The above should make it clear once and for all why I felt the grief so deep. It was like going to mourn for both ‘Grand Pere’, MC and her two other siblings gone ahead some years earlier at different intervals.

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I went for a long walk while burial rites were taking place, that was therapeutic and good for my mental wellbeing

The good news is that, I found healing and closure right there at the burial – so glad I braved it to go. I did stuff I liked like washing the dishes (which is a huge thing at gatherings like this – hence really appreciated) and that was so self soothing, and then I went and spent an hour with MC where she was laid (3,45 am – 4,45 am). I prayed, meditated, read scripture passages on meditation, and listened in silence to MC remind me that life ain’t to be lived in the past participle (as she loved saying). The meditation was also on spot from James Allen: “Who can mend a broken Vase by weeping over it”?.

And so for closure, it is well with my soul. I equally traveled back home safely, and although I haven’t slept properly for 3 straight days, am grateful for the sleep in shifts in the night bus and at the wake. I will make it up gradually… The weekend before was equally partially spent at another burial, the only sibling to a dear school mate…arg life…

It is important in my modest opinion to deal and heal in every circumstance and to do it the way which works best for you. It is therapeutic to Feel your Feelings, Face your Fears and embrace the journey with fortitude and gratitude.

On this note, I cherish MC’s spirit of exuberance and love, I celebrate our memories and am filled with gratitude for knowing her thanks to the largesse of her Angel of a dad who made of my dad the man he is today… Cousin or not, whatever label it is, MC was a soul sister…

Be inspired and motivated us all, happy Sunday everyone

P.s: a brief of my timeline on return home, to inspire and motivate

6 am arrive home

7-9.30 am sleep

10.12.30 pm clean up and cook

3.30 pm – 4.15pm session with client

4.30 – 6 pm power walk for welcome home. I feel so great and know I’ll have a very good and peaceful sleep

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Even if only for Ambe, I wouldn’t stop doing all the advocacy I do


Plain Me
One of the products of the photo shoot: Remember the post behind the scenes?

Hello World,

I am still dabbling with my different grooves; but I could tell from the work out rhythm this morning, they are coming up slowly but surely.
I was therefore very delighted to read the following in my email like 2 days ago:

Dear madam,

I have read your two books, “My Brother’s Journey From Genius To Simpleton” and “My Unconventional Loves.” Equally I just visited your website a few minutes ago, and the Gabriel Bebonbechem Foundation’s website, though I’ve not read much from there yet, but will do so subsequently.

I thought of writing to you because you are indeed an inspiration. When one takes a move to “Make their mess a message” and their “Test a testimony”, it’s an eye opener for others who have faced such similar situations and have withdrawn from the society to stand tall and rather help others with their past experiences. I was moved by the sincere stories in your memoir-book, that I had to give others to read too.

Please continue writing, blogging and speaking too. I believe that just like it did for me, the book will be an inspiration for others too, and a guide book to watch the things they do in life.

And oh, Gabby’s story was so sad, pitiful and… I don’t know how to describe it. The story made me cry, most especially because of the negligence given to epileptics. It was a good initiative creating a memorial foundation to take care of epileptic and mental patients. Please permit me say as a youth, I work with a little initiative called Child Enrichment As Future Leaders with the vision of empowering children, youths and the underprivileged. In our own little way, we can always support the foundation’s efforts and partner in carrying out activities.

A little about me-My name is Che Herbert Ambesi, a Level 300 student in the University of Buea reading Accounting. I love reading inspirational books, novels, plays and Christian literature, and I write a little too. Particularly concerned about the needs of youths and the civil society, I blog about success on cheambe.wordpress.com (Ambe’s Diary), and work with Child Enrichment As Future Leaders (CEAFL), a start up which was initiated by a female friend and class mate of mine two years ago, to see how we can in our own little way contribute to the society (I currently serve as President).

Madam, you are my role model. Keep inspiring!

Happy New Year in arrears,

Ambe

 

P.s: Kindly if you can, visit his blog and show some encouragement. He has like half a dozen posts and few comments too lol. He is full of potential and at this rate he’ll sure be up to all he sets out to do. I have replied and I think he is yet to get to his emails because internet especially in that region is a luxury. Hence am all the more delighted to read his email.

Happy Tuesday everybody

You are best when you are You…dare to find You


You are best when you are you

Hello world, a brief post today to inspire and motivate us all.

I am reading a book which has stabbed my soul, searched my soul, and now my soul is serene all from one book. I don’t know how I can do a single review of the book, but I know I will get there.

Here below is quote therein from Fran Houston the co-author living with Bi-Polar and some other ‘badges’ I can’t envy tbt:

Just being willing to go into yourself is brave. Actually making the steps is a hero’s journey”

And trust me world because I have been brave in undertaking that journey – actually just starting to see the immense and serene light at the end of the tunnel, it is a journey worth it’s weight in Gold.

Remember, the ultimate goal is not even being perfect for people who need you, but being the best for you – And when you are you, then you are the best – let the darkness of the tunnel and its environ not scare or distract you too long. Namatse

Happy long weekend to us all

Inspiring Positive Actions Now Ltd inspires on with Javnyuy Joybert


Awesome Flyer

Hello world, on the 28 the of May 2017,  I took that big leap of ‘Stubborn but very Passionate’ Faith and officially launched the company I had been dreaming and planning on for 3 years.

This Sunday, we have another interesting line up and when you read our keynote speaker’s  profile below, you’ll agree with me that there isn’t only hunger, strife and ‘crazy ‘ politics and policies in Africa.

In my meditation this morning, I summarized these five tips which aptly corroborate the Me doing all I do and where I get my strength from:

1) You can draw strength from the connection you have with others;

2) You can align yourself with the beauty and goodness that resides firmly and persistently in every corner of life;

3) In the darkest darkness, you can shine a light;

4) In the most difficult circumstances, you can act to make a profound and positive difference;

4) You can know, you can understand, and you can live in the service of a purpose that becomes more powerful and refined with each passing moment;

5) Choose to do what you can, and there is no limit to what you’re able to achieve. Amen

About our Keynote speaker for this Sunday June 18th 2017: Javnyuy Joybert

Javnyuy Joybert is a Social Entrepreneur, Empowerment Coach, Public Speaker, Personal Development Strategist/Blogger and a dynamic, prolific and strategic Entrepreneurship/Business Management Trainer and a blend of administrative gifts. He is a focused and purposeful young African.

Javnyuy is a certified Business Management and Entrepreneurship trainer by The American Entrepreneurship Foundation (AEF) California USA, performance and efficiency consultant whose forte lies in Empowerment, Training and Development in the areas of Entrepreneurship, Leadership, Personal Development and Business Management Development. He is one of the youngest and finest Entrepreneurship, Organizational Leadership and results based Business Management trainers in Africa.

Javnyuy Joybert is the Founder/CEO, Senior Trainer and Principal consultant at The Center for Entrepreneurship, Leadership and Business Management Development (CELBMD) Africa – The Pan African Professional Center. CELBMD Africa is an International Center of choice for skills/competency based Professional Executive Training/Development which cut across all levels of industry from Senior Executives to high school graduates. CELBMD Africa offer innovative Professional Executive Training/Development programs and capacity building seminars through the expertise of our renowned trainers, industry experts and volunteers… please visit his website I can’t do justice to this young, dynamic and oh my so so much Icon.

I mean, how grateful can I be right? It is all so amazing and I owe and wish the one I fondly call JJ so so much.

Have a weekend us all

 

About this weekend P1


Hello world, so you should all guess by now that this area girl with these different auras knows how to enjoy herself. So far, my weekend has been a mix of rest, fun and work on my company. The P2 will be about the second event we are hosting today. And oh the pictures seem to read from last to first… Eg last one is my arrival at the mountain village, next one is the mountain, then my being invited to the national radio impromptu to talk about the Gbm Foundation (7 am and it was damn cold), fourth one is huge breakfast offered by my Co-Founder (asap after the show) and finally hiking and team building (that afternoon – Saturday). When I got back home by 6 pm, I went straight to bed until 4 am this Sunday morning…

Till then, enjoy… and take care of yourselves; we all got but one way tickets to through this journey of life

This little light of mine…


Hello world, am in a cab on my way home from a stressful but very productive and graceful day. Although currently stuck in traffic, I can appreciate the serenity and inspiration to write the following lines which could sing for the song from which the title of my poem is taken:

This little light of mine, am gonna let it shine…

This little love of mine, am gonna let it flow…

This little life of mine, am gonna live it full …

Let it shine, let it flow, live it full…

This little laugh of mine, am gonna laugh it loud…

This little smile of mine, am gonna smile it broad…

This little frown of mine, am gonna frown it all

Laugh it loud, smile it broad, frown it all…

This little dream of mine, am gonna dream it real…

This little tale of mine, am gonna tell it all…

This little cheer of mime, am gonna share it all…

Dream it real, tell it all, share it all…

And when all is said, am gonna say it still…

And when all is done, am gonna do it still…

And when all is lost. Am gonna find it still…

Say it still, do it still, find it still…

And when my light goes dim, am gonna grateful go…

And when my turn is up, am gonna graceful go…

And when my life is nought, am gonna let it go…

Let it go, let it go, let it go

P.S, still stuck in traffic. Not even midway gone but am fine reading my kindle shortly. Have a nice weekend, am off for one tomorrow too

Co-founding and Launching a mega coaching Platform – A Big & Bright Leap of Faith


Hello World, I took a great leap of Faith, as a partner and I on the 16th of May 2017 sat in my office and decided to found our own company called Inspiring Positive Actions Now Ltd. The first maiden event was last week and we were 30 in number. This week we are hoping to have many more and the key note speaker is none other than my mum. Her profile will follow the pitch and you’ll now know for sure who made and make me thick in many ways lol

Here is a business pitch I am working on you know… my dream and vision is oh so so huge it scares even me – I’ll appreciate your feedback:

Hi everyone, my name is Marie A. Abanga and I am the Co-founder & CEO of Inspiring Positive Actions Now Ltd (IPANow Ltd). IPANow Ltd is a mega platform for coaching and training to inspire positive actions in all areas of our lives. Our Programs started officially on the 28th of May in Buea Cameroon with an ice breaker for ladies. This is a nurtured vision, it carries a lot of my passion, determination and dedication. We draw from a rich experience of coaching and being coached; giving trainings; inspirational & motivational talks; and we want to tap into an in existent market segment in a region in dire need of inspiration and motivation with a bid to through personal experience and sharing, inspire positive, remarkable and sustainable holistic actions and transformations. Our goal is not only to carve a niche in the ever budding African Market, but to in a decade be among the global inspirational academies. There is so much potential for a business of this nature in a country and continent waking up to its own human potentials and resources to self stimulate its GDP leading to less reliance on donors and debts. Any investment in our persons and business, is sure to produce returns and the opportunity for assets revaluing and continuous business expansion.

I hope some of you may in 5 years time when I think we should be ready to go public, buy some shares right? And my mum‘s profile:

Mrs Bibiana MBUH TAKU is the Founder and CEO of Diversity Management & Consulting Limited (DMC Ltd)

She is a Master trainer & Instructional designer/Agribusiness curriculum developer

Professional Associations and Social Groups

  • IFC Business Edge Master Trainers network

  • IFC Africa Business Edge Trainers

  • Certified IFC Business Edge Trainer

  • Groupement des Femmes d’Affaires du Cameroun (GFAC).

  • Helen Atabong Asaba’s Foundation for Diabete, Women‘s Emancipation & the Empowerement of the Girl Child

  • Gabriel Bebonbechem Foundation for Epilepsy & Mental wellbeing

My Mother My Model
Mum whom I love so much; mindful of all she’s been through with and for me and more

She is based in Cameroon and has had professional experiences in Benin, Burundi, Rwanda, Cote d’Ivoire, Togo, Nigeria, Mali & Senegal and a few european countries like Holland.

She started out her professional career in 1983 with the then American Life Insurance as an Assistant Underwriter and Claims, navigating her way through Pecten Cameroon, going back to school to attend ENAM and graduate as an Treasury Inspector, occupying different positions of responsibility with the Ministry of Finance, returning to Pecten Cameroon, leaving and going to work with Plan International as the Chief Operations Officer, returning once more to the Treasury in Douala, then Pecten Cameroon again right up to her voluntary retirement to set up her Consulting firm in the year 2009.

On a personal note, Ms Taku Bibiana is a dynamic single mother of 3 women the second of whom is Barrister Multipreneur Marie A. Abanga; her only son was called to Glory in August 2014. The Gbm Foundation for epilepsy & mental wellbeing set up in his memory greatly helped and helps her deal and heal from the pain & tremendous hurt of such a loss. She has written several articles, been featured in magazines and been a guest and VIP panellist on shows for various causes she is passionate about.

It is a great honour for us to have her as keynote speaker on Sunday the 4th of June 2017 as she talks to us on the theme: Turning Your Challenges into Opportunities and Thriving.

This discussion is not to be missed, we will listen and learn with Ms Bibiana Taku and Marie (sure like mother like daughter), will also share us some of the biggest lessons she learnt from her mother which have helped her thrived in her right.

Thank you very much
Thank you very much

 

My Gift to all: My Poetry Collection


Kindle Cover

Hello World, today is friday and I wish I were going away from the weekend. But hmm, saturday I accompany my dearest Donna at her Dad’s Memorial Service, and Sunday is my first mega event launching my company. As much as I had had three years and more to prepare this journey, write up a business plan and draw it all up in my head, stepping on that bridge now is sort of daunting though appealing at the same time; I am actually partnering to do this and well the organization and capital raising part of it and all … wow even the lawyer in me is …

You should know some stuffs about life and its people – how some of those who were so glad and full of praise when you helped them with their own business, don’t even as much as bother cheering you emotionally and actually want nothing to do with your own business … how some can actually sabotage with some sarcasm and …

Let me leave it at this, the poetry book is free for 5 days and thereafter the kindle is at 0.99 c

You know, I am not bothered by naysayers, I am grateful for life and all the opportunities to learn, grow and love…

I leave you this weekend with a few pictures which have made me chuckle, nostalgic and grateful for life … all my pictures right?

Happy weekend and take care of your mental health dear gentle readers and followers, Thank you

A Searching Soul: Free for Five Days


 

 

 

Hello world, today I want to inform you of my poetry book available in paperback and kindle on the amazon. I wanted to put it for free on kindle but they said the least price the’d accept was 0.99$. I proceeded to do a free book promotion for the kindle to run from the 26th to the 30th of May (five days is the top for free promotion allowed). Get the paperback for souvenir if you want (5$ once more minimum was 4.98$ strange) and I could send an e-autograph you know – So, here below is a foreword from my Dearest Donna:

Sometimes to express inner stirrings, hearts upheavals and clarify experience, words pour themselves through poets. This may sound mystical and magical to anyone who is not an artist. For me, it’s a simple description of what I experience to birth a poem. In the parcel of words that is a Searching Soul, Marie expresses her inner stirrings and heart’s experiences. She may also have experienced words pouring through her. Her lines carry the signature of her mostly contemplative and even sad moods… I asked Marie and hope she also does a collection of poems that shows off the lighter and joyous moments. Life gives us precious gifts through all experiences be they light or heavy. Some of A Searching Soul resonate with me, perhaps because some parts of Marie’s journey reflects mine. Like Marie I have loved, lost and recorded some of my inner and outer journeys… Marie tells me that she finds some poets’ poems soothing and hopes her own can bring solace to other. They would. To wrap up this parcel of words, I happily include lines that jumped out on the first reading of a Searching Soul.

Hearts longings, be fulfilled

Lofty winged wishes be granted

Body hungers be quenched

Those who serve, lead

Those who truly give receive

The mightily scarred transform to gifted healers

With a flutter of heavenly breeze

Are we not all parts of Marie?

Marie is you, is me – an invitation to dive deep, to seek …

A searching soul, you may find

The object of your longing, the door to your dreaming

Dona Forbin,

Poetess & Storyteller

Author

And here is what I wrote the collection is all about:

A searching soul is basically a collection of my poetry which share my soul’s search for enlightenment. Peace I seek, peace I find, Peace I give through my poems; be it in moments of sadness, depression, and anticipation, I have come to realize the inspiration flowing in me to put together these poems ever so often ends on a positive note no matter how faint. I have come across some soul mates in my soul search, and they have generously shared a poem or two of theirs. I write of my Rosy Garden with its thorns, of the Bad Boys in my Life, of my Super Super Hoero and of so much more… I sincerely think I Know where you come from even though Sometimes I just don’t wanna care… Such are contemplations… Such are some of the poems contained in this poetry collection…