Learning to give David some time to cool down too…

 

David with his local bow and arrow: A hanger and some broom sticks

That is David doing his things. He loves more of solitary play and drawing, than getting mixed up in brawls due to games with others, or mix ups at home. But precisely, the later can’t be avoided, na not among boys right?

So, yesterday morning there was an issue over chocolate paste and how Gaby took too much. David brought that to my attention while Gaby had stepped out do something. Now, Gaby overheard David tell and quickly told him to mind his own business. His words in french were: ‘Jaloux’ (jealous). Of course David wasn’t pleased and before I realized it they were manning up to each other and flinging more words around.

Gaby knows David’s soft spots and plays with those, going as far as calling him ‘bébé au lait’ (literally meaning milk baby – like weakling or so). I had to step in their middle to avert a fight.

I managed to get David to sit down and take off his school bag, then I rubbed him on his back several times. His heart was beating real fast. After a few minutes, I tried to get him to talk but he wouldn’t. We were all running late and so I desperately asked him if he needed more time to process his emotions. He said yes. He at least identified the emotion of Anger from the chart of emotions we have on the wall, and he told me he felt like punching Gaby even if he loved him very much.

I had to let him be because I realized he wasn’t ready to say any more. He was neither ready to talk with Gaby, not to mention make the customary peace of hugging each other while saying it’s going to be ok, and I still love you. Did I mention the last incident between those two which however gladly ended in a tripartite peace making was on Sunday?

Anyway, I learnt from the incident that, just like I sometimes want time off to process my emotions before moving on, so too do kids. I could in a position of authority threaten him into talking or force the peace making, but was that going to be real? Given that I don’t like fake relationships and actions or reactions, I will not expect that of any other including – even especially my children. I hope by the time he comes back from school he has forgotten about the whole incident. I asked Alain who is in the same secondary school with him, to check on him at break time out of sibling love.

My own sibling story is even tougher mindless the sex and age hahaha

Dear gentle readers, in life in whichever relationship, we have to respect the other and not seek to force them to keep to our pace, relate only in a certain way, or be the one we think is best for them. I share this events in my life, to inspire and motivate with my own reality. It all about seeking a holistic wellbeing and giving your children a balanced and good foundation

p.s: 8 pm 20.02.18 I get back home and the two fight out of the door to be the first to greet me are… yes you guess right: David et Gaby (I actually often confuse their names or pronounce in such a one the one comes when I meant the other). David tells me the anger was gone by short break and he felt fine. He choose peace over conflict and forgave Gaby

Have a great midweek all

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Acceptance of the Cramm Awards with gusto…

Disclaimer: Out of laziness and yet wanting to officially accept my award, I did a lot  of— em no just some mild to moderate copy work :

This isn’t my first nomination for awards on WordPress (But am always nostalgic), yet I am ever happy to receive them even if I can no longer be sufficiently gracious and grateful with the awards as in yesteryears. I however still try to make it a priority to formally accept them on my blog with answers to all or the lone question asked (like in this case: bless the founder of this award’s soul).

The above being said, let me start by following other protocol (rules is the right word and they use it no nonsense) to be observed before I answer that question/challenge – so let’s get going:

A word of thanks to The Crack Indian for nominating me and finding my person and all over the place work inspirational. This means so special and I feel so blessed to the extent that I have pliagiarized some of his writing (at least this makes up for the award being cashless lol).

Now a bit of introduction about Cramm for those who dont know about it… 

TheCramm award was created by Liv, the owner of theCramm. Such a pious mind to create such a terrific Blog. Fellow bloggers go and check it out. You won’t be disappointed. (Plagiarism in toto – Marie guilty as suspected)

RULES TO BE FOLLOWED:

1. Include a little bit about who created this award (with a link) and mention the person the who nominated you.

2. Share 3 things that motivate you to blog and share 3 people that motivate you to blog as well

3. Share one thing you hope to do that will improve the world

4. Answer your challenge question

5. Nominate your choice of bloggers and give them a challenge question.(I am going against this rule unfortunately and dare I say fortunately; I am now in that category of bloggers who don’t candidly have time to nominate bloggers and … and also I don’t have that network of award loving people who would answer any questions and pass same on)

1. I ALREADY DID THAT.

2. THREE THINGS THAT MOTIVATE ME:

1. Passion for the Written and Spoken Word

2. Passion to vent and share and inspire cum motivate with whatever I know or don’t know

3. Passion to learn for ever and ever from one, sundry and the universe.

3. Three People who Motivate Me to blog

4. I sincerely didn’t start off blogging motivated by anyone per se other than my zeal to vent to the world

5. Now, I am motivated by my zeal to keep reading and writing past the logical age of reading and writing; and to be candid this takes constant practice lol

6. Ok as for people, em now all my e-family (as in all who hop by to read/like/comment/reach out you know) motivate me to keep blogging.

The Challenge question for all the Nominees: – Why did you start Blogging? Your answer should be in no less than 100 words…(Bless you again)

Ok in 100 words here I go:

I had secretly written my first memoir in December 2012, and when I got to Belgium in January 2013 I realized I could publish that memoir via the Amazon. Discovery number something, and then I started think of not really marketing but letting my story and life and all out on a more regular basis!!! There was and still is so much going on in and around my life, I have simply come to baptise it my ‘Thrilling life’!!! Now, who living a thrilling life and self named Merry Marie wouldn’t want to share that life with others? Not me o, who loves to inspire and motivate, in appreciation to the universe from whom I have been so inspired and motivated. I snooped and sniffed and bingo I heard of WP and even Blogger. I dabbled with both and WP has survived over three years of my putting us through my moods, books wagon and hmm mental health advocacy.

So, I have so far written 159 words and I think the crack indian who nominated me wouldn’t be disappointed.

And here I land dear gentle readers and followers,

I have one more award to accept and then 2 more posts before I ‘vamose ‘for a much deserved summer break YUPPIE!!!

My Gift to all: My Poetry Collection

Hello World, today is friday and I wish I were going away from the weekend. But hmm, saturday I accompany my dearest Donna at her Dad’s Memorial Service, and Sunday is my first mega event launching my company. As much as I had had three years and more to prepare this journey, write up a business plan and draw it all up in my head, stepping on that bridge now is sort of daunting though appealing at the same time; I am actually partnering to do this and well the organization and capital raising part of it and all … wow even the lawyer in me is …

You should know some stuffs about life and its people – how some of those who were so glad and full of praise when you helped them with their own business, don’t even as much as bother cheering you emotionally and actually want nothing to do with your own business … how some can actually sabotage with some sarcasm and …

Let me leave it at this, the poetry book is free for 5 days and thereafter the kindle is at 0.99 c

You know, I am not bothered by naysayers, I am grateful for life and all the opportunities to learn, grow and love…

I leave you this weekend with a few pictures which have made me chuckle, nostalgic and grateful for life … all my pictures right?

Infront of Church on Easter Sunday, making mimicks

Roll call for bedtime lol

Mini swimming pool

Self made swimming googles

Happy weekend and take care of your mental health dear gentle readers and followers, Thank you

Mother is Gold Gathering

Hello world, so this was me at the IMA gatherings for mothers yesterday to talk about singlemotherhood. It was awesome although the media guy didn’t come and so did many invitees. Due to security reasons ahead of today which is ‘national unity day’ in Cameroon_ the event was ordered to be over by 6.30 pm. In Africa and maybe elsewhere, when you say an event is due to start at 3 or 4 pm, well people start trickling in by 6 pm.  I thought I was running and I took my time because I had decided to do so henceforth, and yet I was still the first person there.

Anyway, in images for our collective eyes. My VIP guess was none other than Alain who also spoke twice to his sheer…

You can tell it is us by our smiles lol

A selfie just before the event started

Happy weekend to us all

The day after: Hope they make someone have a good laugh

My pumps have suffered on his feet oh

If you come looking for me in my neighborhood, ask for Gaby’s mother. In French we say La Mere de Gaby. The last but not the least I bet ya…

Ella thought she had seen it all?

Happy International Women’s Day: Doing me some advocacy

Charming host Amy Banda and I

Dear 🌍 , today is the International Women’s day. In my country Cameroon, the traditional thing has been for a special fabric to be designed, bought and stitched. Thereafter, the women go for a match past and then round up the day with merry making.

I don’t do that, and actually planned to stay at home today, you know work and rest free of the brouhaha of the day’s folies.

Yet, when my dearest Amy Banda invited me to both her TV 📺 and Radio 📻 shows, I said see you there. Never tired of advocating for any cause dear to me.

Amy lent me one of her spare fabrics to throw up my shoulder and not appear to be anti-women’s day fabric.

Amy loves her shows, here she regals the four women on the set today.

All four dynamic ladies on the show today

Thereafter, we met again at the radio station for Amy’s program on this year’s theme in details.

From TV, over to the Radio, in company of an upcoming Cameroon musician

All is well that ends well. I had a difficult day yesterday and barely slept 4 hours. Will go home and sleep some more and yes , read all I can.

one of those parties in preparation 🙂

Happy times to us all

All four are free for four days…

What’s the Worst Case Scenario…

Dear World, starting from my most recent publication above, to my Mea Culpa below:

My Mea Culpa

Or wadding through my literary garden reading my brother’s journey :

or my resilience journey: all will be free for four days on kindle amazon.

Get your free kinlde appps; for those who don’t even know how to go about it, you need to download those apps before you can read any e-book On.

I leave us all with this excerpt from the afterword of my fourth memoir:

In my writings, I have come to transcend boundaries to the me I thought was long ‘dead’. That little troubled but hyper kid nicknamed ayo, that turbulent teenager fondly called by some ‘ayobebe’, ‘radicaux’, ‘zam zam’, that battered, tattered but not shattered woman and wife, that ‘guilt stricken‘ mother, that transformed young, dynamic, disciplined and dedicated lady with a new ‘soif’ for life. If I didn’t start writing my journeys down, starting with that first and most unconventional work in which I never spared my reputation even for a second, I wouldn’t be at the stage I am today. I mean seriously, I feel good. At my age, it’s one of those marvels and several people tell me I am very lucky.

From the 18th to the 21st of January 2016, get them four for free 🙂 Share this with all your networks, reading is so therapeutic too and it has taken me roaming and roving over and again 🙂

Thank you very much

I now head off to the magical city of Kribi, had to be for a colleague’s wedding but am deviating to a me-treat ahead of my b-day. Kribi here I come, people see you on Monday 🙂

Warming up for Hawaii and the carribeans for my big 4 – if I get there 🙂

 

 

 

Personal Breaking News: Book Cover reveal- Thank you Dyane

Walking the Talk, unravelling the me within in the process

Oh my dear world, at exactly 6 pm my time today, I finished the draft of this fourth memoir of mine. My goal had been to get it ready for kindly release in November, there are still some days left and I’ll see how soon my editor will/can get back to me on this. You see, I needed that getaway to this Limbe by the sea and for me it’s been more than successful.

I must however thank very earnestly my Darling Dyane for her genuine encouragement and motivation. The power of people genuinely believing in you, cannot be over emphasized. Thanks to Dyane, I dropped going to the beach from my program for today (em not that I know how to swim anyway). There will be several other ocassions probanly with friends, the boys or even some new romanarum prospect (uh huh you guess right, I just learnnt a new word in latin).

Now, Dyane has not only encouraged and motivated me, but she agreed to write a blurb for this memoir which I share here below.:

As I read Marie A. Abanga’s fourth memoir “What Is The Worst Case Scenario” it reminded me of sitting down with a trusted friend, one with whom I could be my authentic self, to discuss the most important issues our lives. Marie deftly weaves her innermost thoughts, life lessons taught by family members, and her philosophy in a lively, inspiring manner. She doesn’t forget to include a key ingredient: humor, which makes reading her book entertaining as well as heartrending.

Brooke Warner, publisher of She Writes Press, wrote a Huffington Post article about the bestselling memoirist Mary Karr, noting,  “I’d guess that Mary has spent a lot of years feeling compelled to defend her own “truth.” She’s examined truth in ways that few other writers have. After all, she’s subjected herself to three memoirs — more than the average writer of memoir to be sure.”

When I read that article I immediately thought of Marie for the same comment could be stated about her. Like Mary Karr, whose groundbreaking book “The Liars’ Club” brought attention to the memoir genre, Marie is an extraordinarily prolific writer of four memoirs. Marie isn’t afraid to examine and share her truth, even when it won’t win her any favors. She has a greater vision: to help other people feel less alone with their fears. This gifted writer and humanitarian has much to teach us, and she does it without coming across as pedantic or boring. Through “What Is The Worst Case Scenario” Marie gives readers a solid sense of hope in facing a variety of frightening and isolating states of mind.

Dyane Leshin-Harwood, B.A. 

Author, Birth of a New Brain – Healing from Postpartum Bipolar Disorder Founder, Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance, Santa Cruz County, California

I wanted to walk this mental health advocacy talk to the end of the rope, by going deep down withing myself and facing my own demons one after the other – at least calling them by name.

Dear gentle readers and followers, it’s been yet another trilling, painful and revealing journey but above all one which leaves me with so much hope for a better, brighter and bigger future spiced with this awesome amazing grace I receiving from my Almighty Father.

Kindly look by here next week for more about the contents and eminent kindle release, I wish us all the best and I hope this other memoir of mine will make a goodread 🙂

Love is in the air huh…

Now to you Dyane, write on I urge, you know you can and that Lucy and I will bark you on to the finish line 🙂

Sights from a Succesful Solidarity Walk

Arriving at dusk for set up

Warm up before the walk takes off and while waiting for others to arrive

The dynamic wife of the Senior Divisional Officer for Wouri led the walk

A delighted Participant

Warming Down after the walk

Country and Programme Directors

My special friend Bea

Aw, at last I can tick this off my Bucket List: Don’t give up on yours

Motor Biking 101 with PRIDE

Hello World, I am loving my period of Grace PG (an awesome definition of my current unemployed self), actually doing a lot of self preparation for the next chapters of my thrilling life. So, this post is as simple as this, while you breathe, believe in your bucket lists no matter how grim your current situation – at least that’s what is happening to me.

During this PG, I have been to US of A. And hmm, that’s where I thought I’ll atleast be able to tick some items off my bucket list, like going on such a bike. So I was so excited to go to Vermont via New Hampshire.

Oh, I saw these Hailley Guys and started to drool some saliva. I even went past the Harley D headquarters in Bowie MD, and men how I thought it was close! Spent a night actually in that vicinity but nada! I almost returned to Brussels ungrateful for all the wonderful experiences I had lived out there, because of this one I hadn’t. I almost gave up on that item especially as my days out here in Europe are numbered – D Day – 11 🙂

And then boom, I come across a guy, right here in Brussels, who tells me he owns a big motor bike – sure I asked for a picture there and then and he sent this:

I promised him a ‘thousand kisses’ for a ride and a 101 class. He oh awesome heart, accepted and we had a date for the very next day after he left work. Men it rained all morning and afternoon and I was almost on my face praying. Then at 5 pm, the sky cleared up just as he was leaving work. So, on that single day, I not only ticked that off my bucket list, but I achieved another feat I had almost thought wasn’t for me at this age anymore 🙂 I have nicknamed him my Champion and I ain’t going back on that 🙂

Dear gentle readers and followers, don’t give up on yours if you have one already 🙂 and in the meantime, here are kisses for us all which I found on the wall of a friend’s building.