Category Archives: Poetry

Inextinguishable Candle


Inextinguishable candle
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It was two decades ago

I had never cried that much

A passing on far away from home

Yet felt to my marrow

~~~

I rushed home to watch

The requiem with the soulful song

Candle in the wind he sang

Then all said Goodbye

~~~

And yours had before that

Marched behind your casket

That single word pierced our hearts

I wondered if that was it

~~~

They had seemingly raced you out

But no you are inextinguishable

Even the fiercest wind

Can’t blow you out

~~~

Look at you now

None can deny

Your everlasting presence

In both their engagements

~~~

The first’s wife has your ring

Their daughter your name

The second’s would have been

Your partner in all things

She even is same age

Is that Coincidence?

~~~

That same media

Race to unearth her race

All things dysfunctional

About her family and herself

Like he doesn’t know

~~~

His choice has been made

Your diamonds are also on her finger

Let them gossip and dig all they May

It has been settled for May

~~~

It could never be more natural

for fragile one you arranged

Right from College his match

For beloved redhead – one as free spirited

Just when it was time

~~~

For me it is not even goodbye

A Rose may wither – its fragrance lingers on forever

You merely passed the batton

Color and age matter for nought

~~~

Yes, You’ve shown me and hopefully us all

That True Love conquers all

Death need not be feared

Nor viewed as the end

~~~

Inextinguishable candle

You need no title nor tiara

Thank you Lady for your legacy

The peoples’ princess forever

~~~

(C) Marie Abanga Dec 2017

p.s: what a sweet inspiration I had this tuesday to write this to my ultimate inspiration and heroine. I still recall how I cried for someone I never knew personally, I don’t think I’ve ever cried even any close,  for anyone I don’t know personally.

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I broke the taboo


When I got there

I was scared to go near

I knew it was out of bounds

Heard it belonged to a shaggy fellow

~~~

He knew none will dare

offer to clear

all the clutter with any duster

it was an implied taboo to go any near

~~~

The reasons were never so clear

the arguements made no sense

 nor did I care for either  

was done with all the quagmires

~~~

I dared to ask and sure It was NO

I recalled Silent but Stuborn love

I dared to go there and did my best

the end result we both loved

~~~

a bond like none other had been born

Stigma can actually be from the source

It takes a lot to clear that out

But with love, it can be done

~~~

OH YES -ALLELUIA

I broke the Taboo

~~~

p.s: Believe me when I write pictures are too graphic of the before to share – needless to share the picture of the after. I am most grateful for the grace to go through and clean up the clutter with passion, love and affection. I was proud of my work and stayed in that space a while with love. The appreciation was tremendous. Sometimes breaking through deserves silent love and nothing more.

 

 

I will not choose


Let it be clear once and for all

I will not choose between you

I owe my existence to you both

~~~

I am a by product of all I learned

Directly or indirectly you both taught

Directly or indirectly I got it straight

Why now do you think I should choose?

~~~

I am sorry for your grievances

Maybe you’re not able to let go

All the scripts and expectations

I have come to shred and have none

~~~

I prescribe myself just one thing

To love each of you just as you are

To love whichever ways works per situation

I also appreciate silent love

When unspoken words and actions say and prove it all

~~~

Thank you both for loving me silently, just as I am

I have mastered the lessons, and give some to others

But now I must confess: consider it a final word

I will not choose

……….

P.s: For closure after an awesome 3 good days with my dad. Be inspired other Children of Divorce in the house. I was never implicitly asked to choose, but grew up with that feeling. So, if you must choose, as it could come to be, follow your conscience and be not swayed by emotions and hearsay. I hope my boys who had bravely not chosen even where I was so far away, will not someday have to choose between their dad and I. I do all I can to leave communication lines open while taming my ego.

Healing and Living


for my friend & I

To Heal we have to Live

To Live we have to Heal

Never heard of a dead Healing

Nor a Living not craving Healing

Healing is often letting go

Letting go of expectations

Letting go of painful emotions

Letting go of tough feelings

Letting go of unmet desires

Living is loving your life

Living is wanting to be

Living is embracing the now

Living is gratitude for the gift

Living is doing your best 

To Live therefore, we have to Heal

If we don’t Heal, we can’t be us

If we don’t Heal, we can’t embrace the now

If we don’t Heal, we can’t be grateful for the gift

If we don’t Heal, we can’t do our best

With Love and Forgiveness 

Faith and Hope

We can find inner Peace

We can Heal and Live

We can Live and Heal

***

P.S: A friend and I are going through a process, let’s call it a healing and living process. I got inspired this morning to write this down. Hope it helps someone out there

Because I am Human


Because I am human, I have feelings

Because I an human, I have thoughts

Because I am human, I seek to love

Because I am human, I seek to know

Because I am human, I want to be treated as one

Because you are human, you have feelings too

Because you are human, you have thoughts too

Because you are human, you seek to love too

Because you are human, you seek to know too

Because you are human, you want to be treated as one too

How do we humans feel?

How do we humans think?

How do we humans seek to love?

How do we humans seek to know?

How do we humans want to be treated?

I don’t know for sure about you

I only know my word and the weight I give it

I try my best not to take things personal

Steering away from assumptions

making myself clear by saying it as it is

Call that sensitive or insensitive

My attitude is all I can manage

With Inner peace as my main goal

Loving is all I seek to do

The how I learn each day

The why I sometimes don’t even know

The when is only now I have

The what is all things living

Because I am human

You Shouldn’t… if You Wouldn’t…


Dear A,

You shouldn’t be quick to speak, if you wouldn’t be smart to listen

You shouldn’t be fast to blame, if you wouldn’t be up to the game

You shouldn’t be dumb to condemn, if you wouldn’t be glad if condemned

You shouldn’t try to impress,  if you wouldn’t try when am depressed

You shouldn’t dare to preach, if you wouldn’t try to reach the real me

You shouldn’t fake you care if you wouldn’t dare an extra mile

You shouldn’t bluff you are clean, if you wouldn’t help the unclean

You shouldn’t brag about your sanity, if you wouldn’t learn about insanity

You shouldn’t boast of your country, if you wouldn’t acknowledge its history
P.s: formally putting closure on some troubling mind muggles recently

I am done with all this rubbish


I am done with all this rubbish

So much rubbish to make me mad

Life seems so shallow

Screaming is all hollow

No one seems to care

Or is it we dare less?

The bills keep pilling

All keeps uphill 

More dose & overdose

They exit this rubbish life

None seems to have any time

Even a dime is hard to get

Who is to blame?

Parents name governments

Governments name establishments

Children blame parents

It’s all so fake

Smells like stale cake

The circle and circus share same house

The mouse is just as mad

Get your ass off my couch

Pull it all together man

If you need another pill

Insurance will cover the bill

Yikes and yish am really tired

What kind of world is this?

We wait for graves to know

That needless was the race

In the now we fight

Showing off our might

What has love got to do?

No cares, maybe some do

We ain’t crazy its dem

Did I show u any diagnosis?

Rubbish rubbish rubbish
P.s: Stuck in traffic, taking out my anxiety and mild frustration at the traffic and more via these lines

Journey or Ending?


The Journey

What cares you more?

The journey or the ending?

I am happy with the journey

I chose to let go

Of both the past and future

Happy is a choice

I have that power every day

To chose it over again

What will be will

Am grateful already as is

p.s: was inspired to write the above after a friend in an email exchange remarked the following ” …Everything works out well at the end. Yours too Marie will have a happy ending…”
And you gentle readers and followers, as you start this week what do you think of the question subject of this poem?

ODE TO FELICITA


three times I was down

three times you saw me up

even your own bed

you let me lie

I can’t tell

how much I learn

in all manners

in words & deeds

healing for me & mine

words fail me

2 say how grateful

and now how sorry

I feel your love for yours

and your loss for your dad

(c) Marie A. Abanga Oct 2017

p.s: For my friend Felicita in appreciation for our friendship and in empathy for her loss

Painful Past v Fearful Future


past v future

Hiya love are you coming along?

Going to watch wrestling match

The fiercest of finals it is

Super heavyweights they are

Painful past & Fearful future

I am glad this finals is here at last  

To say those 2 cause havoc so bad

Have so far trashed many out even me

Seriously, none my friend will be

I care less who destroys the other

The door to my mind their favourite abode

Is henceforth closed by my bestie NOW

It’s been a long one coming

Let them wrestle themselves away

 

p.s: Who is coming along? I’ve got some free tickets…