PR Goretti my heroine shooting for the moon


PR Goretti shoots for the moon
PR Goretti shoots for the moon

She admits like Les Brown motivates, that if we miss then we’ll sure land among the stars.

She tells me this was the philosophy behind the short film: WOMAN!

woman who is to blame?
woman who is to blame?

 This is where you can read more on this sensational short movie by this modestly famous script writer. She ponders on the issue of infidelity in a couple, wondering who is to blame?

I was working on my book just around that time, and you could imagine my interest in her movie, my comments and all. Sure I wrote a blurb for the movie and some more. I think I could play a role if she decides on doing the full movie right?

If anyone is into Nigerian Movies, then you can watch one of her earlier works as a script writer:

Goretti my modest heroine, is a dynamic woman I must admit. She works hard to juggle it all and she recently shared this on her facebook page: “Mastered the art of carrying a screaming 6-weeks old baby while feeding a ravenous 2-year old. So proud! #motherhood #multitasking#itaintforthefainthearted” and yes she didn’t mention the 7 year old. Let me also add that she sleeps last and gets up whenever any of her ‘bosses – haha’ demand and she works hard.

I remember with appreciation, her waiting up for me when I last arrived London and due to failed computers, I had a 5 hour wait at the airport. I got home by midnight, after getting lost and having to take a cab and all. She split the fare with me as if waiting up wasn’t enough.

Now, Goretti contributes so much to the maiden Cameroon film and entertainment Industry, having started out bravely and daringly in the already renowned but tight Nigerian Nollywood. I had the oppotunity to visit her in Lagos back then and was full of awe of her work and plans.

Once interviewed, she admitted it wasn’t easy but her passion kept her aiming. A strong quote of hers: “See the vision, Feel the vision, Be the vision.” Anu 

Here is an excerpt of that interview which you can read here:

Q: What part can a script writer like yourself play in making the relatively small Cameroonian film industry an international brand as is the case with Nollywood in Nigeria?

A: I can certainly not take the Cameroonian film industry to the international stage by myself. I’m a team player and believe in team effort to achieve success. So far, the relatively young Cameroonian film industry has done some fantastic collaborations with Nollywood and the Ghanaian film industry in a bid to expose our talents. With others like myself making films in the diaspora, we will hopefully continue to fly the Cameroonian flag with great content, cinematography and strategic marketing.

And I leave my heroine here for now but soon I will be back to tell you about her newest production.

Dear gentle readers and followers of mine, am l not truly blessed and lucky and to know these many and diverse people in my life? What you say matters!

 

 
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PR Goretti: My Modest Heroine


Heroines in all categories
Heroines in all categories

I love writing about my heroines because then, I express my gratitude to the world. I share something usually personal about these women with the world and l know even one person would learn something new too.

My blogging life started precisely on the 17th of November 2013 with my posting an entire journal. l called it Chronicles of my empowerment by a rally. It would sure make a good read because l started off that rally not knowing ‘shit’, but l ended up a month later among the ‘best’.

Now to my heroine of the day, month and year. She got me to start blogging. I had approached her because she is one of those blogging barons from my country, whose blogs l read even without knowing what a blog was (think 2009). I asked her to share my chronicles on her blog because someone may be inspired. She published them in chunks and after the third chunk, she encouraged me to start a blog.

We fast forward six months, and we have all this. I mean if just for that she isn’t my heroine, then hear some more.

I have know PR since childhood. We lived in the same city and our fathers were friends. She is a jolly girl like myself and you could imagine the instant bond. Then, we landed in the same secondary school and although I am some couple months her senior, that has never made me feel the list ‘stuffy’ with her and all my other ‘junior’ ones.

When we left that school, we lost touched but fate jolted us to the same university. We joined our alma matter association and decided to perform a duo together for our cultural night. Because I couldn’t get hold of that famous picture in time for this post (getting something from Cameroon either by email or post is a headache), I will share the you tube of that clip:

We sang it from our hearts, we went down on our knees, we cried as we sang and yes we got an ovation too.

It’s been that solid of a friendship ever since. It may sometimes be sparse but it is strong.  When I am in London, I enjoy sleeping at Goretti’s and am so glad she let me sleep on the top of her boy’s bunk bed. It was over 20 years ago that I slept on such a bed and how peaceful that was.

A beautiful night on a bunk bed
A beautiful night on a bunk bed

She and I do get to talk away on the phone every now and then, we are both passionate and dynamic women and sure want the best for our kids.

Yes, I love talking with Goretti
Yes, I love talking with Goretti

In the next article on this Heroine of mine, I will talk to you about her work, her modest but important contribution to the Cameroon Film Industry. For now, here is a nice picture she authorized my sharing on this post:

PR Goretti My Sister and Heroine
Green for hope huh? PR Goretti My Sister and Heroine

Dear gentle readers and followers of mine, sharing is caring and commenting is encouraging just like your likes…

 

 

How to Grow Your Business as a Published Author… and Impact More Lives With Your Message


Tae

I discovered Lisa Nichols and until I one day meet her, I am not letting her nor any of her associates out of my e-line. It was thus with pleasure that I learnt of the transformational  author experience. I sure want to grow my business as a published author. 

So dear pals, have you dreamed of writing a book or becoming a successful published author?  Do you have a valuable message that – if put in print – will help grow your business and transform more lives?  If you answered yes, but don’t have your book written yet… keep reading!

There has never been a better time to write your book and become an author.  The opportunities available for authors in the 21stCentury are endless.  Yet, the majority of entrepreneurs who say they want to write a book don’t actually do it.  Why?  Based on more than 900 responses to a recent survey by Transformational Book Coach, Christine Kloser, aspiring authors revealed what holds them back.

Most authors don’t know where to start or what to do first.  They are overwhelmed with too much information and not enough action.  Sometimes things like fear and doubt creep in.  Other times, its confusion, lack of clarity or confidence that can stop an author in their tracks.  Another big challenge for authors is feeling like their book has already been written… by somebody else.

Not to mention the maze of information out there about writing and publishing a book.  Is it best to self-publish or try to get an agent and sell your manuscript?  How important is it to build your platform?  What are the first things to do to start writing your book?  How can you leverage your book to grow your business?  What do you do about “writer’s block?”  How much will it cost to publish?

The good news is, it IS absolutely possible to write your book in a way that is easy, joyful and fun – without wasting your precious time, money or energy going in circles.  It’s also possible your book will bring about profound personal, professional, and even planetary transformation.

Here are three steps to get started:

  1. Strategize Your Book – Don’t just start writing, rather know who you’re writing for, why you want to serve them and how you want to serve them.  Having this clarity up front will help the book flow more easily.
  2. Write Your Book For One Person – Your book is an intimate conversation with one person at a time – as they cuddle up with your words.  So, don’t set out to write your book for the masses – write if for one person and you’ll reach many.
  3. Keep Going – The only reason why aspiring authors don’t end up published authors is because they let themselves get stopped.  The most important thing you can do it keep going… even if it means you write for 1 minute today.  That’s better than nothing!

===================

if you’re ready to take the next step with your book (or even just a little bit interested in writing a book someday) you’ll want to join me for Christine Kloser’s 4th Annual Transformational Author Experience®.  Christine is offering one of the best FREE trainings I’ve ever seen for authors.  Her faculty includes Bestselling authors like Lisa Nichols, Marci Shimoff, Danielle LaPorte, and Robert Allen well as publishing industry leaders like Reid Tracy (CEO and President of Hay House), Marc Allen (Publisher of Eckhart Tolle’s Power of Now), and Bill Gladstone (Neale Donald Walsch’s literary agent).  And that’s just the beginning of what’s in store for you at her FREE Transformational Author Experience®.

I hope you’ll take a look at what she’s put together for you and join us.  It truly is a phenomenal program that has the power to transform your life if you let it…  www.transformationalauthor.com

Christine Kloser Bio

Christine Kloser, “The Transformation Catalyst” is an award-winning author who powerfully combines spiritual guidance and intuition, with nuts-and-bolts transformational writing, publishing and marketing expertise.  The result is a global movement of aspiring authors who unleash their authentic voice, share their message on the pages of a book and make their difference in the world.   Trusted and celebrated by aspiring authors and publishing industry leaders for her down to earth, authentic and inspiring approach, Christine has become the well-recognized leader of the transformational author movement having trained more than 35,000 authors in less than 3 years.   Get her free training at:  www.transformationalauthor.com

Dear gentle readers and followers of mine, I am in and you?

It started with Emotional Abuse: My Story


It hurts without a hit
It hurts without a hit

When we often think of domestic abuse, we sure think of those black eyes and bandaged hands right? Well, we also know today domestic abuse very often includes emotional and verbal aspects right?

Since I started my Monday series on emotions, I decided to talk today about my emotional abuse and of course all other abuse I got in my six year marriage.

In Africa, this issue of domestic abuse is still a ‘semi-taboo’ because of the popular adage to women to  ‘tie their heart’ (just bare it all ) supposedly for the kids or if there are no kids, then you don’t even have a raison d’etre as a worthy wife.

As for men, oh it’s a ‘God forbid’ for even your neigbour to hear that you were abused by your wife. So for them, it is, hmm ‘I beg let no one even hear’.

Well, I tore away from all that, I am an unconventional ‘african’ woman (if it means anything), and I wrote about my Unconventional Loves.

Before I share some of my ‘subtle’ episodes of emotional and otherwise abuse, I admit that I also abused my husband. Both in reaction to his abuse and dare I say out of proportion and irrationality? Could it be frustration and illusion?

On the Divorce Magaine last week, I  shared an article on ignoring the little signs of domestic abuse. That was of course my story.

How it all started

I re-called in that article how it all started as a ‘cold war’. Now, we surely all can remember the cold war of the 60s’ between those super powers right? That was the scenario in my home for a long while, an unhealthy one to say the least. This to me is Emotional Abuse. It tears and mocks at any great emotions you ever had and eventually leaves you doubting your own sanity.

From Emotional Abuse, I graduated to Verbal Abuse.

Well, frankly it is we both graduated. The emotional abuse left us both (each in his own regard I suppose) drained and the intensity of the emotions involved had surely climbed from mild to strong. It was lashing out time. I by then weighed 115kg and this is ‘ugly’. What a good weapon that was. ‘Oh you good for nothing fat, ugly, broke and lousy wife’ to say the least. I mean, I don’t need to wear you out dear readers and followers of mine with such details right?

But, when the abuse took on a physical, I knew I had to choose between Leaving or Living

When the abuse gets physical, there is no turning back. He has done it once, he will probably do it again and again unless…

I remember one episode as recounted in my book, when I locked the door of the room and hid the key with the hope of forcing my ex husband to have a conversation. He first gave me a sound slap, then he broke the door, then he kicked and pulled me out with my hair and throwing me away in the sitting room, screaming he no longer wanted to see me in our bedroom.

That room stayed without a door for three good months although I slept in there.

When such incidents happens and your spouse still demands sexual intercourse and forcefully gets onto you, I wonder what more we have to undergo before we save ourselves?

A holistic abuse wheel?
A holistic abuse wheel?

Yes, Emotional Abuse got verbal and physical and I just spare financial details for I don’t know what got me to put my money into a joint account in the first place!

Dear gentle readers and followers of mine, sharing is helping, and commenting is encouraging unless you think otherwise?

How I became a professional Cleaner


Wow, what a title as in what really are you, right? 

Cleaning

In my tale and profile and all, I describe myself as a dynamic woman. I have several passions which I guess were nurtured as I grew up free spirited and met and still do meet all sorts of people from all walks of life, countries, religions and all.

Cleaning just like cooking should be a given for every African woman, right?

At least I didn’t have a hard time learning how to clean up my mess after I played behind our house cooking with sand, hahaha.

I didn’t also have a hard time arranging my clothes and stuffs in the room, because when you share a room with your siblings you have to take care of your stuffs or lose them outrightly.

I have thus always loved to clean or tidy up and wash things right from childhood, and I remember my elder sister paying me with any dress of hers I wanted if I washed her basket of laundry and all.

This post is not just about cleaning, but about how I became a professional cleaner.

When I got married, my marriage didn’t start off right – nor end off right huh?

My husband didn’t care about ‘home’ and didn’t like staying ‘home’. I would wonder and ponder until I started neglecting ‘home’ too. l neglected the state of my home to the extent that it was almost comparable to a Chine pawn shop?

Chinese Pawn shop

I jolted back to my senses and thought maybe it was actually the mess at home that kept him away.  I decided to work on our ‘home’.

With regards to cleaning, I regained my passion for washing clothes and doing the dishes and all, and even though we had a maid, I did our laundry myself. I also got a painter to redo the painting and took an online course and then gave away many things and re-decorated our home.

It henceforth looked more of like this
It henceforth looked more of like this

I met a guy who made some cleaning products one of which was very good for tiles shining. A friend of mine gave me an idea to start a cleaning service for homes and that’s how I took off.

alternative-cleaning-materials

 

I teamed with this guy and giving my social networks, I got quiet some contracts especially for weekends. I even got to employ two guys.

cleaning_services

Well, not only did my house makeover not bring or keep my ex-husband home, but my new business venture “Angelu Cleaning Services”, was shut down by myself thanks to his pressure and insinuations.

Ange is my name and Lu for Lumiere was my ex-husband's
Ange is my name and Lu for Lumiere was my ex-husband’s

However, that is not the end of my cleaning services. When I came to Brussels, I realised it was a good thing I knew how to clean as a pro.

I got jobs to clean homes and was paid by the hour. Wow I was excited. I love to see the end result of my work and really don’t  feel I am ‘slaving’ or anything.

Ironing and doing the dishes are my favorite
Ironing and doing the dishes are my favorite

Today, even with a regular job, I still take on cleaning jobs every now and then on the weekends. My salary pays my fee installment and provides some for my boys back home, and so any extra income from my cleaning pays my bills out here.

Dear readers and followers of mine, here is my journey to becoming a professional cleaner and keeping my various passions nurtured. What is your take?

June my Jamaican Heroine: series II


I am so excited at meeting June my Jamaican Heroine, at long last, that I am starting this post even before I leave for London. Or don’t you find this exciting?

I could do with some ganja?
I could do with some ganja?

Haha, oh, following series one, I should have met June by now right? Ok, now to :

The report in full
The report in full

I had hoped to meet June after I land in London and get to spend the night with her (hoping to get some her strong spirit while we slept) but my flight was not only a late night, but the computers at London Gatwick airport chose that very night to stop working. This caused a five hour wait to go through border control.

I didn’t lose hope and we quickly agreed on having dinner on Sunday, thus guaranteeing my finally getting to eat a real Jamaican dish. Trust me to arrive 30 minutes before time!

Hmm, June my Jamaican Heroine,

June my all year summer!
June my all year summer!

is all what she tells us in her blogs and much more! It is hard not to fall in love with her. I believe fervently that I walk by faith and not by sight especially when it comes to human relationships. Yes I am an extrovert too and many a time, I have sensed if that relationship or person will be a + or a – (sure you understand).

She is so far the only friend and heroine of mine to get series in my blog and this should tell you more.

We had such pleasant discussions and if she had never told me, I would have thought she was my elder sister’s age mate.

Oh my, June is a woman of faith. She is such a strong woman who has been through so much too in life and who is leaning in.

We may not share the same religious affiliations and passions but that doesn’t matter to me. Her believing in taking giant steps of faith like leaving a ‘teaching job’ to become a full time copy writer and blogger, is courageous, fascinating, inspirational and motivating!

Yes, I am definitely so proud to have met June online, to have reached out to her, to have kept our friendship going, and to have visited her.

I was honoured above all to offer my dear June an autographed copy of my book. She was duly acknowledged therein and wrote a blurb for the back cover at such short notice and with no hesitation at all. She encouraged and still encourages me, gives me valuable advice and was even willing to proof read my book if I had wanted to bother her with that mindful of her hectic schedule.

June and I
June and I

Dear gentle readers and followers of mine, as we grow older, we learn a lot of lessons in life and meet all sort of people.  Amongst those I have met in my blogging life and even out of it, June stands out. I sincerely wish we all get to have such a friend in life, who even if they don’t necessarily agree with all we do, will not let that mare our friendship.

Do you have a similar experiences you may want to share? What do you think about my series on June my Jamaican Heroine? 

Emotions and Categories: My series


I continue my Monday posts on emotions with this research on Emotions and Categories. l assume oh gentle readers and followers of mine, that you must have noticed a pattern of my blog by now right? Yep I am excited about my newest passionate journey and hope to weekly share something on that!

I am calling any categorization I attempt in here as my series because:

Psychologists have yet to fully tackle the question “How many emotions do we have?” Hence Categories of Emotions abound.

Just looking closely at this image, we can try to figure out how many categories of emotions there are or how many we identify with and how we manage or let them ‘manage’ us and much more:

Plutchik-wheel-of-emotions
Plutchik-wheel-of-emotions

Today, I wish to concentrate on the category I will call Great Emotions – what may otherwise be referred to as positive emotions. These are those emotions which keep us ‘happy, jovial, enthusiastic…’ and optimistic and you name it.

Here is an infographic I found on the internet from another blog:

 

Able Absolved Abundant Acceptable Accepted Accepting Accomplished Accountable Achieving Active
Adaptable Adequate Admirable Admired Adored Affluent Agreeable Alert Ambitious Amused
Appreciated Appreciative Approved Approving Assertive Assured At Ease Attached Attentive Atrractive
Authentic Awake Aware Awesome Balanced Beautiful Believing Blessed Blissful Bonded
Brave Bright Brilliant Calm Capable Captivated Cared For Carefree Careful Caring
Cautious Centered Certain Cheerful Cherished Clean Clear Collected Comfortable Comforted
Committed Compassionate Complete Composed Comprehending Confident Congruent Connected Conscious Constant
Content Cooperative Courageous Credible Daring Decisive Defended Delighted Dependable Desirable
Dignified Discerning Disciplined Distinguished Dutiful Dynamic Eager Easy Going Ecstatic Edified
Efficient Elated Elegant Elevated Emancipated Empowered Encouraged Energetic Energized Enthusiastic
Euphoric Exceptional Excited Exhilarated Experienced Expressive Exuberant Faithful Fantastic Favored
Firm Flexible Flowing Focused Forceful Forgiven Fortified Fortunate Free Friendly
Fulfilled Gentle Genuine Gifted Glowing Good Graceful Gracious Gratified Grounded
Growing Guarded Happy Harmonious Healed Helpful Heroic High Honest Honorable
Honored Hopeful Humble Humorous Important In Control Included Independent Infatuated Influential
Innocent Inspired Intelligent Interested Invigorated Invincible Invited Jovial Joyful Jubilant
Judicious Kind Learning Liberated Light Lighthearted Loose Loved Loyal Lucky
Magnetic Marvelous Masterful Mature Meek Merciful Methodical Mindful Modest Motivated
Neat Noble Observant Open Open Hearted Organized Pacified Pampered Pardoned Passionate
Patient Peaceful Perfect Persevering Pleasant Pleased Popular Positive Powerful Praised
Precious Prepared Present Productive Proficient Progressive Prosperous Protected Prudent Punctual
Purified Purposeful Qualified Quick Quiet Radiant Rational Reasonable Reassured Receptive
Recognized Redeemed Regenerated Relaxed Reliable Relieved Remembered Replenished Resolute Respected
Respectful Responsive Restored Revitalized Rewarded Rooted Satisfied Secure Selfless Self Reliant
Sensational Sensible Sensitive Serene Settled Sharing Simple Skillful Smooth Soothed
Spirited Splendid Stable Steadfast Stengthened Strong Successful Supported Sustained Tactful
Teachable Temperate Tenacious Tender Thankful Thoughtful Thrilled Tolerant Tranquil Triumphant
Trusting Understanding Understood Undisturbed Unhurried Unique United Unselfish Upheld Valiant
Valuable Valued Virile Vital Warm Wealthy Willing Wise Wonderful Worthwhile
Worthy Yielding Zealous

 

Wow, what a list? How many of these do we identify with? How of these are glad to possess, manifest, portray, look forward to having, actually realize we want to have, should have and can have? I am curious myself and am studying as I make these discoveries.

So what do I hope to do with my research on Emotions and Categories?

Once I get established, my aim will be to help my clients amongst others, to manage their emotions. It is imperative to do so for this greatly impacts our well being. I will work with them to realize that it is ok and normal to discuss their emotions, both men and women alike and sure even children and that we have watch out the extent to which we allow the intensity of our emotions to affect us and our relationships (and I mean both Great and Not so Great emotions – positive and negative).

I truly wish to be able to accomplish this passionate mission of mine and to help more than I could otherwise have done.

Please, feel free as usual to leave your generous comments on emotions and categories as you see it. Don’t forget to also share this post so that many more are touched 🙂

Learning to Cook


Going from the title of my post I think we may be wondering if any African Woman should even write such right?

Learning to Cook
Learning to Cook

I mean, we take it for granted that we are supposed to know how to cook and clean especially if we ‘rightly’ grew up by our mama’s side right?

When I was growing up, it was all but very normal that girls stay in the kitchen with mama and the boys go round with papa. Yes, the kitchen was ‘out of bounds’ for boys and men.

Well, I wasn’t a ‘normal’ girl then and my book or even my tale tells it all. I spent more time around my papa or out in the ‘wild’ than anywhere near mama’s kitchen.

But today, my post is not only about learning the simple technique of cooking a plain meal, no it is much more.

Given that I spent the barest minimum time around my mama’s kitchen, she and all all but ‘wrote me off’ as even an amateur cook. I remember promising myself one day I was going to surprise them. In the mean time, I consoled myself cooking kids ‘sand meals’ for my dolls.

Cooking for my dolls
Cooking for my dolls

What they didn’t know was that in all those homes I visited, I stayed with the girls and their mummies in their kitchens every now and then and learnt a thing or two. Yes at home I was never trusted to even fry an egg and my mama will say I could only cook for the ‘dog’ and she didn’t have food for me to ruin for him.

When I got married, my Mother in law took it up too as if she knew what I had grown up to/with. She hammered and haunted me how I had to first live with her for some time to learn how to ‘cook what she knows her son loves to eat’. She made it a habit to show up (starting right the day after we got married) often and of course unannounced with some dish or the other for her son. This was the last straw.

I started learning however l could and read all l could and practiced all l could until l became the amateur cook l am today. Wow, my darling darling says l cook so well and have a 2/3 star – coming from a French Man – means a lot.

With cook books and all
With cook books and all

I so much loved to cook and cook that I can’t blame only child bearing or stress for the hefty 115kgs I once weighed.

That’s not all however, because there is a sad note to my learning experience. The more I did my best and cooked even three course meals hoping my husband will even be Gentleman enough to come back home early, eat my food and leave even a slim compliment, the more he ignored me.

Well, I continued learning and nurturing my passion, I even encouraged my sister in law who wasn’t making any headway in school, to go into one of those ‘cooking schools’.

I cooked for my kids and ‘friends’ and all.

Cooking with Love
Cooking with Love

Today, I cook for my darling darling and he loves it so much that he has opened a ‘private restaurant’ for me.

French Cuisine includes dressing a table
French Cuisine includes dressing a table

Haha, I am even learning French cuisine pretty fast can even bake so well me who never baked or watch my sister bake (she loved and knew so well to bake and still does) until coming over.

Learning French Cuisine
Learning French Cuisine

So dear readers and followers, I don’t know if this is my experience alone but what I have learnt from this is that we can thrive in anything we truly set out to do.

I would be glad to read and respond to your comments and sure if you share then it means much more!

mum, author, mental health advocate, therapist, inspires & motivates with personal experiences

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