Tag Archives: Gratefulness

Sahadat my PA, all in one at the office and my Heroine


When you pray for something, you get it. That works for me – and I mean all the time – it may just not be on our time, or the way we want it, but it definitely shows up.

That is how Sahadat showed up nearly 2 years after I started praying for an all in one at the office. Sahadat or my miss as I fondly call her, is the type we call in french “la force tranquile” (the calm force). I don’t know how else to put it, nor show the universe how grateful I am to have Sahadat in my life.

I first met my miss ( She was a Miss for real at the University a few years back oh), when I lectured/facilitated a masters course called The Law of Enterprises in Difficulties. She caught my attention because she wasn’t the smiling type and hardly looked my way when she entered the class. She however never missed a class and answered any questions I asked her. Long story short, I got through her and she became a group leader of an all male team. On the day of their presentation, they all agreed she was a ‘no nonsense leader”. Their group was among the best needless to say.

Here is a line of what she wrote to me at the end of our course: “Thanks for all the beautiful remarks, you are the best female teacher ive ever had…”(unedited)

We kept in touch and one day I mentioned to my miss I was looking for an intern. She started out as one and had gradually morphed into my all in one at the office and my heroine.

The line is definitely blurred between us as in she is my staff, sister, baby miss, PA, and a generous aunty to the boys. Two days ago she was sick, I made her a hefty and healthy breakfast since we were to work from home, made her some ginger/turmeric tea and bullied her to eat. Later I saw she really needed more rest, and so I sent her back home. I asked her if she could have done same for me if I were sick (since she was first refusing my offer to nurse her some), she agreed, and so I asked her why I couldn’t do same for her without having to bully her. She told me in camouflaged words like my son Israel did, that my type of love ‘can suffocate’. We laughed over it, she ate her food and drank the warm healing tea, and then she was good to go back home.

Sahadat has some of my passwords, manages my calendar, is a quick learner and doer and much more.

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Working with me from home, my miss is all focused while I fidgit around lol

I am sincerely so grateful for Sahadat. I am no longer the only female in my team at the office lol.

Did I add how humble and grateful too she was? I wish all entrepreneurs a dynamic colleague like Sahadat and I hope we stay on for a while before a bigger and better offer comes her way lol

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Great experiences this past week with Insomnia, loss of speech and co


The trip to the village reading me some to cheer my journey

A) I lost my grandma and her burial was this weekend in fontem- Anglophone Cameroon hence no network while I was there. I lost my voice somehow and here are 4 inspiring takeaways from that:

1) Always be grateful for the miracle of life, of sight, of speech, of hearing, of walking etc. When you lose any, you can then know what those in similar situations are going thru

2) Appreciate the virtue that is silence. Silence whether intentional or unintentional, if appreciated opens you up to good meditation, observation and enhances your listening skills. When silent, you learn just so much.

3) In everything give thanks and keep a cheerful attitude. I learnt small to make gestures and write some more, I got some more loving from my family especially mum who bought me a bucket of ginger, garlic and lemon lol to be mixing daily until the voice returned. I ate just one small ginger last night and the voice is returning…

4) No condition is permanent here below…we are all on a journey. Even the blind man gets better once he by feeling accepts and adapts to his condition knowing even that is not permanent. When we die, all those disabilities and etc die too. And this is why, I have embraced my hearing deficiency with Grace.

B) And yes, before that, I blogged here near daily of my struggle with insomnia. Indeed, a friend had to stake his money on me to let me know he had confidence I was up to the challenge. Ha, so this is how that ended: After Granny was burried, I told her now in meditation that I had not been able to sleep right for the past days but that I really needed to sleep starting from that day which was a Saturday. And guess what: I went to bed at 8.30 pm and woke up at my normal 4 am. I decided to monitor my sleep again last night, this time we were back to Douala at my mum’s.

I went into Granny’s room and lit a candle and I told her I wished to sleep in her bed. I put on the nightie she had on the day she died ( uh huh daring right?), and I told Insomnia aloud, dare show up – you know I don’t fear sleeping in Granny’s bed wearing her nightie. Oh boy did I sleep so sound. From 9 pm to 4 am as routine. 

And that’s it, I beat insomnia without drinking Camomile after all. I was a worried when I first lost sleep last Tuesday , and some advised I go see a doctor. I followed my intuition which urged me to wait it out a week first. I put all my faith in that, and saw a therapist for psychological help with that wait. It was worth its wait in Gold.

The lesson I get here is that sometimes patience is so vital, identifying the source and not just treating the symptom is also vital. Finally, having a positive and grateful attitude and sourcing alternatives and not just looking for a magic pill is also worth it.

After the burial I took a motor bike to go down to dad’s which is like 30/45 mins away

C) Does the above picture say it all or what?  Dad has been telling her friends stuffs and three of them thanked me for taking care of their friend lol. I am just showing him ( the only dad I have anyway) some love while he is still around.  Wouldn’t want to write my feelings in a mass and tribute booklet if I couldn’t show them to him while he lived.

With the above, I wish us all be inspired and motivated to have a great day and week.

The Ultimate Appreciation Award


The Ultimate Appreciation Award

Hello world, last week and indeed since I started blogging in November 2013, I have received so many awards, and always wondered if and when I could give out an award too. I have therefore, em unanimously, decided to give out my own created award: The Ultimate Appreciation Award to the following bloggers in appreciation of their support to my modest person both directly and indirectly during my blogging journey. Now, because I know many of their blogs are “Award Free Zones”, my award is a “Rules’ Free Award”. Your acceptance of this award via a comment in the comments section will suffice. However, if anyone of you wants to do an acceptance post and pass this on even to myself lol, feel free to do so and while at it, here are 3 questions I’ll will be honoured if you answer same:

  1. Share 1 or 2 or 3 childhood memories with us;

  2. Share 1 or 2 turning points in your life;

  3. Share some words of wisdom or otherwise about blogging as you have experienced it,

My Nominees and my why…

  1. June Whittle over at Miraculous Ladies, Divine Copywriter and Co. Junie as I fondly call her is my Jamaican Heroine in London. Indeed, she is now one of my sisters from a different mother. I have blogged about her and my visit to her serene space and yummy Goat stew and peas and all, and while you are here, check out her poetry book so soulful and her BBC Interview

  2. Dyane Leshin-Harwood over at Proudly Bi-Polar. Dyane or Lady Di as I call her, is also my captain over at Lose It. She and I have a special bond and baddass – she knows what am talking about and she is another of my heroines. Her voice was soothing and I am praying I get to visit the US and her own coast so as to ‘Redwoods bathe’ with her and in the meantime I anxiously wait for the official release of her epic memoir

  3. Pamela Spiro-Wagner over at Wagblog Dum Spiro Spero!!! I simply don’t know what to write and what to leave out about Pammy as I fondly call her. She is more than a mum to me, a soul sister and much more – she inspires me to the moon and back, read the post I did about her here and seriously visit her blog if you want to know first hand what or how someone can live with a diagnosis of schizophrenia (go through all she’s been through) for over 4 decades, and still be the author, poet, artist and all she is…

  4. Kitt O’Malley over at Kitt O’Malley. Kitt is a a strong woman in every respect. To be going what she is going through (with herself, her son’s own issues and her parents) and still holding it, while finding time every now and then to share with others either via her blog, or on ours through her likes and comments, or as a volunteer and etc, is simply put amazing. I sincerely appreciate her comments on the Gbm Blog where I hardly get any…

  5. Doctor Jonathan over at All about Healthy Choices. Since I found his blog, I appreciate life and the choices I make more. So much information, such a selfless man, and he gives advice freely if only you’d ask as simple as that. I am so grateful for the few emails we’ve had, his concern about anything health and above all his hosting me once as a guest on his awesome blog…

  6. Buffalo Tom Peabody&Team over at buffalotompeabody’s blog. His or rather their blog is the spot to unwind after a hectic day. You read maybe about the next century or decade or the reverse; the current global or rather US instigated, enhanced or quelled rigmarole and much more – em without threat of fire or fury. I sincerely wish I had more time to read this blog as often as I’d love to. However, whenever I hop by I leave with a replenished Laugh Gauge…

  7. Yvette R. Toko is my last but the not the least blogger I appreciate all the way home to Cameroon hurray. Her blog which let me to another kindred spirit is so glamorously titled – guess – bam bam bam: For the Love of Cameroon. She is a dynamic, passionate, God Fearing, oh I wish I could write down all those adjectives and more; kindly check out her book for the love of Cameroon on the Amazon

    Dear all, wishing you a happy Sunday and thanking you for your prayers and kind thought following my request of yesterday. It is improving.

Be not Ashamed


no shame

Be not ashamed to cry

You can’t store it all forever

Crying is no sign of weakness

Humanness if you ask me

An emotion just like others

Be not ashamed to cry

When it hurts so bad

When the knee gets knocked

When the mind goes mad

Crying can help inside out

Be not ashamed to tell

When you’ve gone thru stuff

So shameful you want out

Telling could bring such help

And who knows who you help

Be not ashamed to write

Write it all for you or us

So much therapy if you try

You have to take a step

Ignore stigma and shame

Be not ashamed to read

Read yours and ours

Keeping the brain as busy

Just like you should your body

But be not ashamed of your pace

Be not ashamed to hope

Even when all seems hopeless

The last beat maybe bring a break

Hope that break could lead to a breakthrough

What is life without hope?

Be not ashamed to love

Love yourself and others

Try and try and try

You never can tell when

One more time could be deal

Be not ashamed to be You

P.S: This has personally helped me a lot. I remember hearing Obama and other big figures say asking, crying, reaching out for help is not a sign of weakness but of strenth

A Mother’s Love


Birthday gifts in abundance

I recently turned 35 and I received all sorts of gifts which moved me to tears. They varied from flowers, pullovers, beautiful messages and songs and yes a kindle which I had longed to have for so long.

I even got to be treated to a Japanese cuisine, of course the first in my entire life – oh what a show it was with this super concentrated chef who played with utensils and produced delicious dishes right in front of me.

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But there was one gift which touched me most and of course that was from my MOTHER!

I know the message comes from her heart and I reproduce it here for you all:

“On Thursday 18th January 1979, at Clinique de Berceau, after TD Fiscalite in IAE Douala  (where she was attending school at the time) I was blessed with the gift of a baby girl. We named her Marie Angele after an Italian member of the Focolare Movement, a renowned midwife who delivered her. She has brought a lot of joy into my life and even some tears. She is our l’homme de situations difficiles and a sure support in the most difficult and challenging of situations. She bears the names of her paternal grandmother and the courage and generosity of my mother. Ayo, you are every blessing that I could ever have prayed for. May God continue to bless you and bless others through you.”

Mother’s love they say is supreme and yes although I am sure to bring her more tears, I am surer of her unconditional love for me.

Angelique: My first Belgian Angel and Heroine!


Angelique and I

We surely all know what it means to move countries right?

When I got a visa to come to Belgium, I knew no one. I had a relative or two in some corners of theirs but for reasons and circumstances, they couldn’t host me.

A dear uncle of mine, knew this lady and her family. He asked her if she could host me- of course for a rent. She agreed, and set the price at € 300 and they had a deal for 6 months.

He gave me that as a surprise package and his support for my future endeavours. I then prayed that this lady from far off Rwanda,  be more than a landlady of mine.

She came and picked me up from the airport and took me to her warm family. We had a special meal that night and she briefed and prepared me for the realities to face as much as she could.

She gave me my first boots – actually two of hers and although we weren’t sharing shoe sizes, I was so touched to have and squeeze my feet in them. I have since passed them on to some other less fortunate person.

She did all a big sister could in her best and possible means and she even became a friend and confidant too. I think I got much more from her than the contrary.

Today, I no longer live with her and I am doing much better. Yet Angelique and I are still so close.

My friend and I visited her during the christmas season and she dared screamed at the modest gifts we brought for her daughter and herself.

That is my Angelique and her name really tells it all. I truly wish her all the best now and always as she struggles with her own issues and life.