Tag Archives: Introspection

All the Single mothers: All the Single mothers…


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Dear World,

An emotional recap of my single motherhood journey. I share part 1 of a 3 series post to be featured on the phenomenal blog Miraculous Ladies

http://miraculousladies.com/single-motherhood-story-part-1/

Have a great midweek

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What do you measure achievements by???


The dreaded mumps of 5 days ago are all gone

I am sitting as you can see from the above picture ( I just learned how to play with pictures et voila), waiting for a gathering to start, I am already anxious because it’s an hour and a half late and still no sign of starting. I have already been given my badge as a panelist, on which it is boldly written: “I am a Barrister at Law”. That badge sparks this post…

Is the Barrister accolade my greatest or even an accomplishment I want to be known or remembered for? It’s not like I was ever asked which to be used anyway.

This musing about accomplishments flashes me back to a discussion with someone last week about the same subject. Ah my ever searching soul…

I had just been told someone I knew had been appointed to a high public office. I was sure happy for them, and in our exchange we marvelled at all their accomplishments. Well, those we knew of, those we read and heared of, you know like this my ” Barrister at Law” tag…

And then I told the person I was chatting with that I looked at accomplishments from a very different angle altogether. For example, I told them I felt they had accomplished a lot coming out of a tradegy the way they have. I added that I felt more accomplished today than 10 years ago when I ironically had more money, two cars and was a ‘Mrs’…

But then, this is my view; it depends first of all I guess on what you consider accomplishments. Maybe I should have started this post by looking that up?

So, I scheduled this post for two days later, so that maybe I could come up with ideas over the weekend or some input from a discussion I may pick up during the gathering.

In the meantime, another of my recent accomplishments is being able to treat a dreaded mumps with more natural remedies than would otherwise have been the case 10 years ago… (I only grudgingly took an anti inflamtory for 3 days) – and am also grateful for all the moral support I had during this difficult period

But then, let me throw this open to my e family, what do you consider accomplishments? What do you measure them by?

Have a great week ahead

Are you defined or refined by your past???


Do we see or feel the rays no matter how blurred; or we only see the narrow and dark path? How much is this a cause and effect of our past?

Hello world,

We are approaching the weekend and my ever contemplative and searching soul just thought about what my past has or is still doing to me. I then thought to share it with us all here and maybe inspire others to do their own introspection.

Ok let’s go.

1) Did my past cause me so much pain to make me despise lots of it? YES. I have admitted my role in all the mess of my past and tried to deal with them in different ways all with a bid to heal. Now, we all know the wise saying about not focussing so much on your past to let it influence your present right? Well I dare argue that wisdom so so easier said than done… There are many including myself who have numerous times over been both physical and mental victims – hostage of their pasts. Some pasts have been know to impact so badly our present circumstances so much that the future is completely blurred and unfathomable…  but then next;

2) Am I so ashamed of my past to talk about it or share it? Me, NO. When I realized how much shame of my past was killing me slowly and almost got me to drive a knife in, I decided, (even if implementing that took a few years) to deal with that shame and talk about that past through any medium available. For me, it was also a way to fight stigma. The stigma associated with being a ‘loser, a pimp, an addict, a mentally challenged or ill, etc etc’ and who knows whom will be helped by my story right? ok, and so what now;

3) What has facing my past and pain and sharing done? Oh my, the big big positives negate the tiny setbacks or few hate trolls. I even got a national award for my very first memoir. I have become much more self-empowered and aware, so full of gratitude, so conscious of Amazing Grace, so full of faith, oh so determined as a women’s rights and mental health advocate.I hardly turn down any invitation to talk about my past, share my lessons and journey and yes on my own platforms there is no hiding where I come from… I have become one of those brands you don’t mess around with and I am at peace with this ME… Who knows what or where I would have been had I not made that conscious, painful and challenging decision  to deal with and heal from my past;  and so in conclusion;

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Today, I confidently answer that my past has not defined me but it has refined me – it has helped me to embrace self-improvement, self-love, self-appreciation, self-worth and oh my self-esteem is better than ever. This has been a long journey and actually an ongoing one… But, am better equipped and am using that past and pain as solid foundations from which to springboard to greater heights in all faith, hope and charity.

And you…??? Please share cause you really never know who can be helped by your comment

Have a nice weekend everyone!!!

Book Presentation: Sassy, Single, and Satisfied: Secrets to Loving the Life You’re Living by MMH


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For All the Single Ladies in the House

My Story with this epic book

When I first came across this book by Michelle Mc-Kinney Hammond, whom I really just so love, I really contemplated whether I should buy it, read it, and review or share my reading /enlightenment journey whenever I was done. I knew even then, that this book wasn’t going to leave me the same although I couldn’t for sure figure out what this book was going to do to me. I could only hope that whenever I did get to read it, I should want to read it a second and third time again. I have had it for 12 months, and I have read it 3 times, and I now feel ready to share my reading/enlightenment journey.

After my third read, I realized I had never looked up the word sassy before:

sassy: ˈsasi/: adjective informal lively, bold, and full of spirit; cheeky.

Single we know or I do, and satisfied I think I do too. Honestly, it is the sassy I didn’t know what to really make of in relation to ME. There is a me and there is a ME and after my divorce in 2011 I can’t even tell which was living inside and outside my body. Today, over 5 years later, thanks in a very large part to the hundreds of books I have read in the past 3 years, from great authors like Maya Angelou, Iyanla Vanzart, MMH… and up coming ones like my friend June Whittle and several fellow bloggers, the inspirational and motivational messages listened reverently to from Oprah Winfrey, Michelle Obama … I can say I am well on the scale of ME living inside and outside of my body: Closest I feel to being Sassy; Single and Satisfied. Don’t get me wrong, one day I could get back into a relationship, MMH is actually in a fabulous one now – but I guess the big deal is in embracing and loving your singlehood to the point of being sassy and satisfied enough with you and life as is. I think you contribute best to a relationship you go into being whole inside out than otherwise!

What is in this book  Disclaimer: I don’t know what happened to the formatting, just bear with me am no techy

This book is about Love! Wow wow wow… MMH takes us through her personal journey of finding, keeping and sharing love. With who? First with herself; jointly with God; and then with the world; and then with whoever came next by God’s Grace. In this book, no one came next but that was ok for then. The most important she shares in this book is her journey to loving the marvellous mess she had made of herself, and of realising and accepting and surrendering it all to God who in his Awesome Almightiness revealed to her that she had every right to be Sassy; Single and Satisfied until her next chapter as He would will.

MMH uses her knowledge of the bible and much more, to teach us and share with us much of what she has learnt and now knows about Love – and Men – and Lovingly Living with Yourself all through the process of Life. Maybe I am gradually becoming a very intense person or am just being so really ME and sharing same in all vulnerability – but I have no regrets whatsoever.

This is another of those books I can’t do any justice to with any rating or review: has hit me as hard as the Four Agreement and Taking The Mask Off. Before I got married, I never really contemplated what being single meant and how I felt about it. I actually lived that stage of my life out waiting for the next boy friend/man/relationship … a very tiny and near insignificant me to my eyes and mind lived inside my body and I even at one point thought of discarding that body completely from the face of this earth. I can never forget that. This explains my total Gratitude to all who have helped me along my journey to ME. I hope this book does something to anyone who picks it up especially the single women in the house.

About the Author

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Michelle McKinney Hammond is the author of over 30 books on living, loving, and overcoming. She is the President and Founder of HeartWing Ministries, which hosts annual DIVA Weekend Getaway Conferences. As a relationship and empowerment coach, internationally known speaker, singer and television co-host, it is Michelle’s mission and passion to help women and men to first be intimately connected to God and then empowered to become their personal best in order to experience victory in every area of their lives.


Michelle’s ministry began many years ago when she suffered a devastating leg injury from being hit by a car. The accident was a spiritual turning point, a wake up call to embrace her purpose and fulfill her destiny. Those bedridden months gave her time to complete her first bestselling book, “What to Do Until Love Finds You.”
Michelle eventually left behind her career as an advertising art director/writer/producer for clients such as Coca Cola USA, McDonald’s Corporation, Ford Motor Company, and others, to speak to audiences, encouraging people to fulfill their God-given purpose in life.