All posts by Marie Abanga

I am a forever young, dynamic and entrepreneurial mum of 3 boys. Determination+Discipline+Dedication & Passion+Persistence+Perseverance= my motto. l am on a journey, one to become a personal and mental well being coach of reference and a dynamic mental health advocate and psychotherapist with a difference.Coaching, Speaking and Training are my passions, and all about books fascinate me - I read and write with love. lt is worth it and life has only been this tough but good. There is strength in what remains, check out my sensational memoir about my unconventional loves and life and also about my finding the strength in what remains despite having been battered and tattered. To sum up, I am every woman, a determined, disciplined and dedicated woman of faith. Trying times are not times to quit trying. I love my family and my cat Ella. I love music, sports, conversations about all or nothing, travelling, cooking and why not dancing! I am very spiritual and God fearing to put it plain and simple.

Time for another blogger break to re…


Hello world, I was hoping to put this up last Friday but got funky and carried away.

This year 2018, has been a terrific one so far. So full of grace. Learned and loved so so much. Done so many exciting things ha….girl you deserve a break.

And maybe the best is that I just started another relationship like just last week, and this is someone who had me under his radar for over 8 years? I mean I can’t scare dem away with my shaggy no matter how much I try lol

These cool photos were taken last Thursday at the cementary, ahead of the feast of all souls the next day. I went to help him clean his granny’s tomb. That’s the tradition here, don’t know about out there.

While on break, I of course will be on so many other stuffs, including really trying to get my head and emotions around getting settled into a relationship which may go long term.

Until then, maybe a 10/14 days will do, I wish us all the best. Let me take this blogger break and re…(don’t even know the word to use lol)

A break every now and then is super self care and self love…take it from the psychotherapist herself hahahah

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Would you take free candies from such a bag?


What a halloween display lol

Friday is here and it is a Funny Friday for me. So my darling Phoebe shared the above picture with me and this is what she wrote:

This was my Halloween display with candy for passers by in the pumpkin bag  The arms are papier-mâché complete with fake painted wounds!! I think I scared people away with it!!!
Dunno about you but men, would I have fled hahahaha

School shouldn’t be scary, home too…


Hello world, lat week Friday my son Gaby got abused in school by one of their teachers. I mean real one until lad got blisters and I had to take him to the hospital.

So, the mama bear I am and of course the advocate I am, took this up seriously and got what I wanted from the school+teacher concerned. I did a Facebook live video here to share that.

School shouldn’t be scary and neither should our homes. I hope teachers stop beating and abusing children, and I insisted that teacher talk with my son and all the class telling them he was sorry. Gaby told me that day the teacher did and told Gaby he was now going to keep an eye on him lol.

I also advocate that we parents step up our responsibilities towards our children.  They are growing up, and someday we wouldn’t have them as children again – but adults and parents too why not. What would we have taught them and shown them by example? I know I am trying my best, I have put a lot on hold to make time for them, especially for Gaby whom I left when he wasn’t even 2 years old. He said in one of my live videos he was sad when I left – and to think we spent 4 good years living away from each other while I strove in my different wildernesses?

Maybe this is also why I am such a Mother Bear after all hahaha

Happy midweek everyone

It is called: Hope for the Abused and Battered Association


my gift from god1059994039..jpg

So world, last week I said there was something in the pipeline. It was going to be all about Hope. This girl who navigated by grace from Hopeless to Hopeful is now ready after 3 years of grooming, to contribute her might in giving hope to others still in that hopeless hold of despair…

Before I write further, if you are on Facebook, please show some love by liking our Facebook page. 

When I was about to start this year, my spirit told me it’s going to be my year of Grace. Barely a month into the new year, my spirit said set yourself aside for 70 days and do a spiritual journey fasting from 7 things. Ha, I mean even my mum said I was going nuts.

Not only were some pissed I was seemingly leaving the legal practice to get into psychotherapy, but they weren’t even seeing any clear road map.

Now, earlier this month same spirit said start doing live video campaigns to advocate for the battered, and then a few days ago – bingo; you are creating an association and you will call it… I wrote down the constitution and everything in like 3 hours – it was near magical – I got the numbers to call, found the support from an awesome sisterhood network I belong to online, volunteers reached out and long story short we are on our way to legalization and more…

Would you say I walk with stubborn but passionate faith or not yet convinced?

At Hope for the Abused and Battered, we have the following objectives:

The association Hope for the Battered (H4B) has the following objectives:
• To provide legal assistance to victims of domestic violence, and the battered in our communities;
• To provide counseling and psychotherapeutic assistance to individuals and groups;
• To raise awareness and sensitize the population on the damages caused by domestic violence, and all other forms of violence;
• To encourage a spirit of peace, love, forgiveness and living in harmony in our communities;
• To cooperate with associations with similar objectives

Here are our four focus areas:

1) Hope for victims and survivors of Domestic Violence;
2) Hope for persons living with a mental illness or mental challenges;
3) Hope for abused children and youths; My own son’s case is going to maybe be the first we handle as an association lol
4) Hope for the Battered and Tattered by life.

Anyone wanting to join us and make a difference should kindly contact me. It must not be financial assistance, we still need to build a website and get the word out sort of. We need to get legalized then start looking out for partners and sponsors… I know this will be huge, I pray for the Grace above all

Have a great week everyone, thank you so much for all your support, reading, liking, commenting, I really appreciate and am often moved to tears

 

Is this child abuse or what? I need Grace to handle this


I came back home to this. Gaby (9 years old grade 5), says his teacher chose two of them to set example on. They were playing after tests and the teacher was angry.

Tomorrow is PTA for the secondary section, his brothers are there so I will be attending. I am thinking about how best to handle this.

The teacher used a gaz pipe. Out there you guys may not have gaz pipes but they are tiny pipes linking the gaz plate to the gaz bottle.

I got numb, and then cried, and then reached out to my sisterhood.

Thanks for your advice everyone

The Startup Grind Douala brings Marvin Cole of OVAMBA wow


 

Some things make and get me so excited I may need to drink some coffee to calm down.

Wait up, it was last last year the first startup grind Douala event and yours truly was there big big time. Let me find that post lol

So, tomorrow again, I’ll just create time and show up men – they are bringing Marvin Cole of OVAMBA – I mean I love learning – and from people who have hustled and bustled to the top – this girl I am is already bouncing so much. My outfit is was hung out this morning for the sun to warm it up some lol

So, I’ll dash in an out the PTA of the 4 musketeers I now have lol, then a meeting from 2-4 pm, no blackman time is allowed cause am the one hosting, and then 5-8 pm Bano Palace (a chick one for that much)

Life is good, have a fantastic weekend everyone

Hmm seems Facebook Juju got my moral values & co too right lol


My Moral Codes

Now, for those who don’t about Facebook ‘Juju’, it is those links which you see every now and then asking you to take a ‘face reading’ sort of, by their ‘mediums’ lol. I mean what can I tell you other than that yours truly has been taking some of those ‘face readings’ and the results are quite impressive?

Last Wednesday I shared some, when announcing a ‘huge social project’ in the pipeline. It’s all about keeping the Hope alive in myself and humanity.

So ‘Facebook Juju’ not only got the moral values right, but also something about what people notice the first time they meet me, and em also that am someone special lol

Now, I wish I had those links saved so I could share for someone to maybe go try their luck? Would that be wrong to do? I don’t really know o. I am however happy with my results – and o that were free face readings hahaha. Sometimes your mental wellbeing gets some boost from where least expected. These make me really feel like a princess.

Have a great weekend everyone

Something huge about Hope is in the making…


Happy midweek everyone. Now when I started this year and my spirit told me it was my year of Grace, I just wrote that down and said Amen.

The above picture is from one of those Facebook picture readers. I love and agree to that one intoto. And below are some 7 facts about me they got right too.

There is something in the making and I got a name and a small team already.

Yes, that’s life for someone like myself who is freedom and love. A tale of talents and a vessel of her Almighty Father. Where ever He Leads I go. His Grace Alone is sufficient.

Thank you in advance for all your best wishes and prayers

From my Therapy Trenches: Mirror on the Wall


Mirror Mirror on the wall…?

Hello all and happy new week. I had a pretty busy weekend (like there are some lazy ones more often right?) Hope everyone is hanging in there.

I thought to start sharing some shenanigans from my Therapy/therapist trenches (I mean I am in daily therapy myself, and as a therapist I work with clients every now and then). I basically am my own therapist and the boys are an excellent co-therapist team.

Today I look at one of the techniques I use in my trench. I ask some clients to look at the mirror and tell me what they see. I had one in the office (when I was at the hospital) and I always hope they carry one in their bags too (thinking of the ladies lol). After that, I ask them to talk to the person they see in that mirror.

I got real inspired to use this mirror technique after I was able to reach out to a client after two ‘unfruitful sessions’ at the hospital. I asked her the third time she came if she had a mirror in her back. She frowned but pulled it out and started making excuses for her appearance and ‘pimpled face’ oh my. I told her I saw all of that but that’s not why I asked if she had a mirror. She said she hadn’t made up that morning because she was running late. After trying to resist my urging her to ‘just look at herself in the mirror’, she did. I told her to do that for just 3 minutes but after the 2nd minute she broke down crying.

I then encouraged her to feel the feelings, face the fears and write down all she wanted. Later on, I encouraged her to talk to the person in the mirror.

It was after everything a wonderful experience for both of us. A few others have appreciated that technique too.

I have a mirror Infront of my room, I share the mirror with the boys. I look at it to see myself in all my shades, and I love to talk to myself. I do that before I leave home and before I go to bed each day.

I find this technique awesome and don’t know if any other person uses this, or has had to participate in any such experience.

Until next time, have a great week and stay inspired+motivated everyone

I finally wrote a letter to the girl I once was…


Wow, sometimes swallowing your own prescription pill is hard I must confess.

Come see me to be sharp in advising my clients to write a letter to their younger selves lol. It took a call for stories (for an award hahaha) over at World Pulse (which I equally just joined after years of procrastination I must add).

Anyways, I wouldn’t critique myself so much. I had  done a photo therapy and even slept with my childhood  photo under my pillow.

Please, go here and read the letter yours truly wrote to Ayo as I was then popularly known…

Have a great weekend everyone