All posts by Marie Abanga

I am a forever young, dynamic and entrepreneurial mum of 3 boys. Determination+Discipline+Dedication & Passion+Persistence+Perseverance= my motto. l am on a journey, one to become a personal and mental well being coach of reference and a dynamic mental health advocate and psychotherapist with a difference.Coaching, Speaking and Training are my passions, and all about books fascinate me - I read and write with love. lt is worth it and life has only been this tough but good. There is strength in what remains, check out my sensational memoir about my unconventional loves and life and also about my finding the strength in what remains despite having been battered and tattered. To sum up, I am every woman, a determined, disciplined and dedicated woman of faith. Trying times are not times to quit trying. I love my family and my cat Ella. I love music, sports, conversations about all or nothing, travelling, cooking and why not dancing! I am very spiritual and God fearing to put it plain and simple.

How I embrace alternative treatment?


Last week I was down with malaria which starting attacking my system on Monday 10th and ran up to Thursday 14th.

On Monday I tried to ignore it and worked out vigorously but that didn’t do it. I wrapped myself all up and did sleep straight that night but the next day Tuesday I felt nah you got to go see a doctor and get a prescription. You can see the pictures of the medicines prescribed above, but I knew I couldn’t rely only on those medicines.

I added some natural herbs cooked and covered myself in there so I sweat some crap out for 5-9 minutes, you can see me sweating really good after each of those wrap ups lol, and I did that for three days /twice a day. That also helped me sleep much better and I felt better too.

Eating is hard when am sick, but I knew I had to pamper myself and get some much needed nutrients from some food anyway. So I got me some river joy and cerelac (normally for kids and babies but so what), added bananas, avocado, soft bread and much much tea. I tried brief walks on Wednesday too, and had a full rest and recuperation day, even that too wasn’t easy hahaha.

On Thursday, I was strong enough to go to court and see into a client in custody, my health fully restored by Friday, I did a bail application and that was granted this Monday 17th. I am so happy I embraced alternative and holistic treatment to the best of my capacity and could get back on my feet sooner than later. Be you inspired and motivated therefore, to embrace alternative treatments in your recovery. Am not sure I would have recovered pretty well and fast had I accepted to be admitted, or just stayed in bed all the while…

Have a great weekend everyone…

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So what did the teacher say today?


Happy midweek world, while I still sort visa application stuffs ahead of the vip World’s 1st Global Ministerial Mental Health Summit due for next 8-9 in London, and for which I made a mini fundraiser right here on my blog (grateful to have already raised 120 out of 200 usd target), let me share something which made laugh real hard last Monday. Some of my greatest joy as a single parent is the us moments I have with my three sons either individually or jointly lol.

The first two aged 15 (almost lol – remember how bad we wanted to grow old at that age lo) and 12, don’t even want to be seen walking ahead/behind or worse still by me to their school. I have only my Gaby 9 and still in primary 5 to walk with you know hahaha. He sometimes even begs I do it more than the twice/weekly lol. You can imagine how excited he was to see me step out of the cab when I saw him walking back home. I was equally headed home and figured why not step down, walk some with him, and find out how the day went right? Walking to/from school with Gaby is equally revelation/bonding time and he didn’t let me down this time around. He looked really happy and I wasn’t concerned he could be feeling afraid like in my Monday post.

He actually got me laughing real hard and it was so therapeutic given my day at the office. He has this line since nursery school where all he can recall from the teacher is: ” Take your bags and go home”. Here was I thinking Grade 5 will bring a different and more concise answer to a probe about what the teacher said – but nope.

So parents, here you go if you ask them funny questions, as he later explained to me. He said he found that question so funny and for ‘small children’. He advised me to ask more precise questions about the lessons he learned and what the teacher taught the best etc

Now, you have a great midweek and see you on Friday as I get into alternative treatments using a recent experience…

Why am doing this mini fundraiser to attend a Mental Health Summit in London here…


Hi everyone, I am a little ‘laggy’ doing this mini fundraiser raiser here to attend a VIP summit in London next month.

I was recommended by the coordinator of the Global Mental Health Peer Network (am a recently appointed executive representing Cameroon), to the organizers of the summit sometimes last month and I forgot about it. Three weeks ago, I received a formal invitation, filled the form and boom in 4 days I got an approval as a delegate.

Well, I couldn’t fund that and didn’t know I could go to the delegates’ area of the website and download a form to fill. Last Monday, at 11.30 am, I pay attention to an email from the organizers saying the last day to apply for funding was that same 11th at 12pm. I had probably been overlooking updates and co from them thinking it wasn’t a lead worth following (why I didn’t just as usual apply for funding I don’t know). Here I zoomed quick to delegate area using the PW I had been provided but never even bothered changing, downloaded the form filled same and sent it back at exactly 11:50am.

Can you believe my joy when last Friday I received a funding approval for transportation and accommodation for the two nights of the summit?

Issue now is visa fees which stand at 200usd with my appointment set for Wednesday like in 12 hours I hav to pay that amount.

Two reasons am doing this mini fundraiser therefore:

1) I need to raise the fees before 12 noon tomorrow or lose the appointment slot (the dates are already too close and I don’t wish to lose that slot);

2) I would love to see the tribe support me attend this very important summit. I will consider it a big blessing to have even 1£ or 1euro or 1usd from any of my gentle readers or followers for this.

So, if you are moved to donate, I will appreciate you send any amount you have to my PayPal. This is so abrupt I know, I really didn’t want to throw it out here until I realized I really needed help.

Thank you very much in advance to all who will donate, be sure I’ll acknowledge each of you personally.

God bless us all

Sometimes go with them and listen to them to know how they feel…


When you look at Gaby’s smile can you tell he was afraid? I am so happy I walked with him to school on his first day of school and could sense some anxiety in him as we got into his school. His grip of my hand firmed up and he became so quiet. He was moving into a new class -G5, and was probably wondering how it was going to work out. I asked him how he was feeling ( not good to ask them what’s wrong or embarrass them by saying they are acting up etc), and he frankly told me he was afraid. Wow, the Gaby I thought I knew? Afraid of a new class? Wow really – as in what can we really know for sure right?

To make matters scary again for him after I had tried my best to make him face the fear and near overcome it, we just discovered the class teacher is the same who taught G4 last year and with whom he didn’t get along for the few days he spent in his class. Mr D is a ‘no nonsense’ teacher who even spanks oh my. So we quickly agreed on Gaby’s best option being that of greeting Mr D and behaving better in class, and we see how that goes. Gaby agreed with me that Mr D was not spanking those who were not rowdy in class and who did their homework. We had a plan and I had to help him out each day to the best of my ability…

And that is how I have added home teacher to my list of daily occupations, trying to get up keep up and even slightly ahead why not lol.

Current feedback: He likes his new class and teacher because the latter doesn’t spank him. He answers questions in class and is more attentive than playful and distracted, although his buddie from last year got moved to the 5B and he kept in 5A, he is getting to make new friends and can still play with buddy A at break time. At this age, such stuffs definitely matter big time lol

My point or prayer is that especially with our children who sometimes seem they got it all together, when they are transitioning, we should walk the journey with them. Walking that phase may be driving them/dropping them off each day for a few days or a week before they start taking the school bus, and listening to them/asking them how they feel everynow and then. And this is taking care of their mental health too, teaching them it matters and they can trust us to tell us whatever is going on in them at any moment…

Here is to a great week of bonding and listening between parents and children

Talking about kids+talents: May I introduce OTANG The Rap Princess from Cameroon


With the above clip, and in light of this week’s theme on my blog about children and their amazing talents, I wish to introduce OTANG The Rap Princess from Cameroon Africa.

Its been just 3 months since I discovered this free style of hers on Facebook…and you can tell I was mesmerized to the point of contacting her manager to offer pro bono legal services for when the big deals start coming lol – and bet ya they are here already. Miss OTANG DA GAME CHANGER is already the “Brand Ambassador of the Voice of Hope International Foundation”.

Recently on promotion in Yaounde the capital city – invited to some prominent shows and all such great platforms, she took time out to reach out to the less privileged kids on the streets.

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And so, her EP was recently released in grand style, and is currently making waves in Cameroon.

OTANG is a brand and voice to be watched and I hope some big labels sign her on early before the deal skyrockets…read more about this Game Changer on the awesome 237Showbiz site right here.

 

OTANG is my heroine no joke, I can’t wait to meet her in person and get my own selfie while the celebrity train is still within my reach o

Children could have so many talents… let’s nurture them


Hello world, wow another week is here and boy am I happy the three muskeets started off school great and am doing my best in this all. There is so much to be grateful for as parents me holds, but above all as it stands, I am immensely grateful to have my 14 years old son for a barber. He not only shaved me, but he did shave his brothers’ own too.

And how you may wonder did it all start? A few days ago, I noticed he spent a lot of time at the neighbour’s. He don’t usually do that and so I was curious. It was then his brothers told me he goes there to learn how to shave. And to think he had been doing like he was sneaking? Oh my boy, probably thought I was going to be ‘mad’ at him or whatever. But hey anyone here will be ‘mad’ at their boy for learning a new hustle and one which will save you all some time and money? I mean this is healthy hustle, not drugs pushing so why wouldn’t I encourage that?

And to say he is gentle and careful is an understatement. He was so grateful the neighbour trusted him with his appliance…oh my lord help me but I have to buy a complete shaving kit before the month is over lol…

And I share this to encourage us parents in here to let ‘the children tell/show us what they can do’.

When I was growing up, I remember keeping to myself and my friends all over anywhere but far from home. When I heard the sound of my dad’s ride or my mum’s voice, I shouted ‘order’ and that was the code word for everyone at home to adjust themselves and even get ‘lost’. Remember that tagline ‘Children should only be seen and not heard’?…well in my home it sometimes felt like even to be ‘seen’ was calling for ‘trouble’ hahaha

So, starting a new week us all, may we parents/guardians/aunties/uncles and all in between, encourage and nurture our children/wards to be the best they can be at pretty much any thing they are good at especially if it wouldn’t land them in trouble with their soul or the law hahaha

My self care journey: My Super Support System


Hello world, this is the mega wrap up of my self care journey I have been sharing with us all for the past two Fridays, and I couldn’t do any conclusion without letting you in on my Super Support System. Now, I have a whole support system and not just a support network of individuals, because some key actors in my super support system are not individuals, nor even tangible objects. I mean you can think of a forest, a beach, a river, waves, music, feelings invoked by meditation…

1)The People

My family+friends and oh my 3 musketeers. Some of my few but special friends have been featured here and are both offline and online. From Judi Joli to Beautiful Bea to Darling Donna and my own Lady D Harwood not forgetting my precious Phoebe and more; hmm I am special and blessed. My mum is equally an indispensable person in my support system even if our relationship has been through its own share of shaky hahahaha. My sibling too know what to do or not to do to show some support too. The musketeers know so much about me and what I even sometimes need without my screaming so much lol. They are one of my natural antidepressants and am ever grateful.

2) The Places

There are places I just need to go to and I feel supported. First on this list is the Loo my love. Sitting in the loo especially my own loo lol, is like …words fail me to describe the experience. My room, the woods, the beach, you know those places which just help you calm down and relax. I have hardly felt any “fire on the mountain or had 1000 miles per micro second thoughts” in these places.

3) The Activities

When am down and I fight to even get up and dress up for a work out, the chances are if I do leave that bed, I’ll walk. Walking even if painfully and no matter how many steps I take nor what I do thereafter, is a big support. I feel much better when I try to work out especially when I don’t feel so good. Another activity is meditation, or praying, listening to calm music, a recording of the waves…so much soothing support

4) The reading and writing

I know they could go under activities but they just deserve to stand alone. I know realize the extent to which reading has been a vital coping mechanism and now a very special component of my support system. Now, writing is but the natural effect of all that reading right? I once wrote a book in 30 days at the height of my grief following my brother’s death. Insomnia near sent me to a psych ward but it seems the writing kept me grounded – dunno if this makes sense lol. I just don’t know how to spend a day without reading or writing and I have been known to calm down and glee when I see a book (especially one of mine) when am not doing too good.

5) The Advocacy for myself and others like myself

I have come to realize that advocating for myself and others like myself, is very important to my self support. I add this to my support system because I know that the more I advocate for myself and others going through similar or more difficult times, the chances are I feel better and more people relate to me out of empathy than sympathy. This is why I write about the good, the bad and the ugly of my thrilling life hahaha

Be inspired and motivated…a big big THANK YOU to all who are part of my support system, the activities and all – Girl you are definitely trying your best lol

Have a great weekend us all

 

Peace sometimes has a price for parents I bet ya lol…


Hmm happy midweek world,

Say this has been a bugs bunny week so far… My musketeers started a new academic year on Monday and well supermom don’t come with super powers oh me…

So, on Sunday Sept 2, after the family meeting and checking all blablabla, I mean Alain had even shaved my hair same like theirs as you can see in our photo (that’s a post on its own), I just wished for some peace. But hmm, what you said???

They had other plans and all I kept getting were reports and wails and all. No energy to shout or threaten, I quickly decided to motivate with some cash…that is…I set the bar high in exchange for a 100frs (not up to a dollar or euro bey hey that huge for them lol) payment.

I said he who could win all 3 rounds of a certain game could come and get the money. While waiting, I got me some peace…they needed all their concentration to play and hopefully win all three rounds; and you can guess if anybody did win hahaha

So, was I smart or what? I needed peace and I got me some peace…they played with each other instead of fighting with each other…ok I compensated with a yummy dinner ahead of back to school on Monday September 3rd.

Be inspired and motivated us all, the journey can only get more exciting with a little creativity hahaha

SIWO WEEKLY MEET & GREET SHARE YOUR BLOG LINK! 8.31.18


It’s been slightly over a month I joined the ever growing number of authors at the amazing SIWO, and today I challenged myself to join in the awesome meet and greet. I mean, other than the benefits of increasing the numbers of … you seek; it’s just beautiful to belong to an inspiring community and meet new people+schools of thought etc. So, who here wants to hop over to SIWO and make hay while the sun shines? hahahaha

Success Inspirers' World

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‘Round the World!

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FOLLOW these simple steps:

☀️☀️ADD your BLOG link to the comment section.

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☀️☀️VISIT other Blog links in the comments below.

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🦉”Just because no one’s ever done it before doesn’t mean it’s impossible. Go for it!” – Unknown

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1st Globuntu Online Summit: I’ll be telling my story from breakdown 2 breakthrough


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looking at all 10 storytellers, do I look like the typical  ‘Angry black woman’? hahaha

Hello world,

Another is week is here and we are starting a new month for real. Wow, the 9th month in this 2018 which just started like yesterday? And yet, I have so much to tell about this year, one which my spirit revealed to me was my year of Grace. Ah, it’s been Amazing Grace how sweet the sound…all along. Thank God really that I blog so much and have all my records as I progress – cause sometimes it could feel surreal what has happened or is planned by faith you know…

One of these plans, is to join a panel of 10 amazing storytellers to share my story of what I did when “Shit happened”, and I was near checking out altogether from this life.

Storyteller Marie Abanga

You could watch the Ted X by the amazing founder and host Ms Beatrice Achaleke – my boss lol, where she talked about what she did when “shit happened” in her own life. Needless to say Beatrice is my heroine, have worked with her from my most tender age and we are related by much more than blood. Here is the introductory post I did of her several years ago hahaha.

 

Now therefore, anyone who believes like Iyanla Vanzart once asserted that:

“When you stand and share your story in an empowering way, your story will heal you and your story will heal somebody else.”

Will rush to book one of the few remaining early bird tickets before they are all picked up…click right here and sign-up cause am so excited to get to tell my story on this beautiful platform offered by the Globuntu Academy for Happy Minds. I will forever be grateful to and for Beatrice.

While at it, maybe you would love to check out the Facebook event page or look out for the Globuntu Academy for Happy Minds?