Category Archives: Parenting

School shouldn’t be scary, home too…


Hello world, lat week Friday my son Gaby got abused in school by one of their teachers. I mean real one until lad got blisters and I had to take him to the hospital.

So, the mama bear I am and of course the advocate I am, took this up seriously and got what I wanted from the school+teacher concerned. I did a Facebook live video here to share that.

School shouldn’t be scary and neither should our homes. I hope teachers stop beating and abusing children, and I insisted that teacher talk with my son and all the class telling them he was sorry. Gaby told me that day the teacher did and told Gaby he was now going to keep an eye on him lol.

I also advocate that we parents step up our responsibilities towards our children.  They are growing up, and someday we wouldn’t have them as children again – but adults and parents too why not. What would we have taught them and shown them by example? I know I am trying my best, I have put a lot on hold to make time for them, especially for Gaby whom I left when he wasn’t even 2 years old. He said in one of my live videos he was sad when I left – and to think we spent 4 good years living away from each other while I strove in my different wildernesses?

Maybe this is also why I am such a Mother Bear after all hahaha

Happy midweek everyone

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Is this child abuse or what? I need Grace to handle this


I came back home to this. Gaby (9 years old grade 5), says his teacher chose two of them to set example on. They were playing after tests and the teacher was angry.

Tomorrow is PTA for the secondary section, his brothers are there so I will be attending. I am thinking about how best to handle this.

The teacher used a gaz pipe. Out there you guys may not have gaz pipes but they are tiny pipes linking the gaz plate to the gaz bottle.

I got numb, and then cried, and then reached out to my sisterhood.

Thanks for your advice everyone

Life and love goes on in our hood


After my rant of yesterday and the meh feelings, I am happy to be on a great going today.

We did our meditation, starting again with a mini course for life. Those daily cards are simply epic. Such communion time with the team is more VIP to me than putting the home in order and etc etc.

I have said my serenity prayer over the missing lenses, and handed that over to my Almighty Father.

Indeed the day started on a very positive note and I feel fantastic.

Wishing us all a happy midweek and a day full of life and love all the way.

I am an angry woman and a wounded single parent today


https://web.facebook.com/marieangeleAbanga/videos/1224200294388439/?t=4

I hope that link takes you to the live video rant I just did to explain and sort of manage my anger.

Here is a sum sort of: “I am an angry woman and single parent today. My son’s lenses got stolen in class yesterday in a minute and all I get when I go there today, is more interrogations of my son and I, and a call to calm down. The Dean of Studies says he will talk to the class. In the meantime my son can’t copy his notes, and is already feeling I don’t even know how to put it”.

Don’t know what any one in my shoes will feel about this whole incident, I don’t even know all the feelings am feeling currently

15 reasons why am so grateful for Alain as he turns 15


 

Hello world, this whole week is sealed for me. It starts off with my first son’s 15th birthday and that alone is enough to make my week. Nothing is going to get me offset this week by Grace.

I am so grateful I kept my pregnancy against all odds and stigma, shame and all. No time for melancholy, only celebration. My son is a grown young man now and wow what a blessing it has been all along.

 

So here are 15 reasons why am so grateful for Alain especially on this day;

  1. He is the epitome of my joy;
  2. He is the evidence of God’s unconditional love and amazing Grace in my life;
  3. He is a hardworking young man;
  4. He is a our barber at home;
  5. He is the Commander in Chief of our Home; while am the mum in chief;
  6. He is named after my dad and reminds me of my dad daily;
  7. He loves his family both nuclear and extended, and he shows it;
  8. He is my 1st sounding board for 15 years now;
  9. He is the best big brother his brothers could ever have;
  10. He is a friend to many;
  11. He is the best home teacher to Gaby lol;
  12. He is an example to his mates;
  13. He is on honour roll all the time;
  14. His teachers are ever proud of him;
  15. I count on Alain quite a lot and he hardly lets me down.

For a single mother and parent like myself, who stumbled onto motherhood 15 years ago, I am sincerely only filled with love and gratitude for all my sons, Alain topping the list of course hurray.

Dear all, join me wish hum a belated happy birthday and transitioning into…

 

 

So what did the teacher say today?


Happy midweek world, while I still sort visa application stuffs ahead of the vip World’s 1st Global Ministerial Mental Health Summit due for next 8-9 in London, and for which I made a mini fundraiser right here on my blog (grateful to have already raised 120 out of 200 usd target), let me share something which made laugh real hard last Monday. Some of my greatest joy as a single parent is the us moments I have with my three sons either individually or jointly lol.

The first two aged 15 (almost lol – remember how bad we wanted to grow old at that age lo) and 12, don’t even want to be seen walking ahead/behind or worse still by me to their school. I have only my Gaby 9 and still in primary 5 to walk with you know hahaha. He sometimes even begs I do it more than the twice/weekly lol. You can imagine how excited he was to see me step out of the cab when I saw him walking back home. I was equally headed home and figured why not step down, walk some with him, and find out how the day went right? Walking to/from school with Gaby is equally revelation/bonding time and he didn’t let me down this time around. He looked really happy and I wasn’t concerned he could be feeling afraid like in my Monday post.

He actually got me laughing real hard and it was so therapeutic given my day at the office. He has this line since nursery school where all he can recall from the teacher is: ” Take your bags and go home”. Here was I thinking Grade 5 will bring a different and more concise answer to a probe about what the teacher said – but nope.

So parents, here you go if you ask them funny questions, as he later explained to me. He said he found that question so funny and for ‘small children’. He advised me to ask more precise questions about the lessons he learned and what the teacher taught the best etc

Now, you have a great midweek and see you on Friday as I get into alternative treatments using a recent experience…

Sometimes go with them and listen to them to know how they feel…


When you look at Gaby’s smile can you tell he was afraid? I am so happy I walked with him to school on his first day of school and could sense some anxiety in him as we got into his school. His grip of my hand firmed up and he became so quiet. He was moving into a new class -G5, and was probably wondering how it was going to work out. I asked him how he was feeling ( not good to ask them what’s wrong or embarrass them by saying they are acting up etc), and he frankly told me he was afraid. Wow, the Gaby I thought I knew? Afraid of a new class? Wow really – as in what can we really know for sure right?

To make matters scary again for him after I had tried my best to make him face the fear and near overcome it, we just discovered the class teacher is the same who taught G4 last year and with whom he didn’t get along for the few days he spent in his class. Mr D is a ‘no nonsense’ teacher who even spanks oh my. So we quickly agreed on Gaby’s best option being that of greeting Mr D and behaving better in class, and we see how that goes. Gaby agreed with me that Mr D was not spanking those who were not rowdy in class and who did their homework. We had a plan and I had to help him out each day to the best of my ability…

And that is how I have added home teacher to my list of daily occupations, trying to get up keep up and even slightly ahead why not lol.

Current feedback: He likes his new class and teacher because the latter doesn’t spank him. He answers questions in class and is more attentive than playful and distracted, although his buddie from last year got moved to the 5B and he kept in 5A, he is getting to make new friends and can still play with buddy A at break time. At this age, such stuffs definitely matter big time lol

My point or prayer is that especially with our children who sometimes seem they got it all together, when they are transitioning, we should walk the journey with them. Walking that phase may be driving them/dropping them off each day for a few days or a week before they start taking the school bus, and listening to them/asking them how they feel everynow and then. And this is taking care of their mental health too, teaching them it matters and they can trust us to tell us whatever is going on in them at any moment…

Here is to a great week of bonding and listening between parents and children

Talking about kids+talents: May I introduce OTANG The Rap Princess from Cameroon


With the above clip, and in light of this week’s theme on my blog about children and their amazing talents, I wish to introduce OTANG The Rap Princess from Cameroon Africa.

Its been just 3 months since I discovered this free style of hers on Facebook…and you can tell I was mesmerized to the point of contacting her manager to offer pro bono legal services for when the big deals start coming lol – and bet ya they are here already. Miss OTANG DA GAME CHANGER is already the “Brand Ambassador of the Voice of Hope International Foundation”.

Recently on promotion in Yaounde the capital city – invited to some prominent shows and all such great platforms, she took time out to reach out to the less privileged kids on the streets.

img-20180907-wa00002116823292.jpg

And so, her EP was recently released in grand style, and is currently making waves in Cameroon.

OTANG is a brand and voice to be watched and I hope some big labels sign her on early before the deal skyrockets…read more about this Game Changer on the awesome 237Showbiz site right here.

 

OTANG is my heroine no joke, I can’t wait to meet her in person and get my own selfie while the celebrity train is still within my reach o

Children could have so many talents… let’s nurture them


Hello world, wow another week is here and boy am I happy the three muskeets started off school great and am doing my best in this all. There is so much to be grateful for as parents me holds, but above all as it stands, I am immensely grateful to have my 14 years old son for a barber. He not only shaved me, but he did shave his brothers’ own too.

And how you may wonder did it all start? A few days ago, I noticed he spent a lot of time at the neighbour’s. He don’t usually do that and so I was curious. It was then his brothers told me he goes there to learn how to shave. And to think he had been doing like he was sneaking? Oh my boy, probably thought I was going to be ‘mad’ at him or whatever. But hey anyone here will be ‘mad’ at their boy for learning a new hustle and one which will save you all some time and money? I mean this is healthy hustle, not drugs pushing so why wouldn’t I encourage that?

And to say he is gentle and careful is an understatement. He was so grateful the neighbour trusted him with his appliance…oh my lord help me but I have to buy a complete shaving kit before the month is over lol…

And I share this to encourage us parents in here to let ‘the children tell/show us what they can do’.

When I was growing up, I remember keeping to myself and my friends all over anywhere but far from home. When I heard the sound of my dad’s ride or my mum’s voice, I shouted ‘order’ and that was the code word for everyone at home to adjust themselves and even get ‘lost’. Remember that tagline ‘Children should only be seen and not heard’?…well in my home it sometimes felt like even to be ‘seen’ was calling for ‘trouble’ hahaha

So, starting a new week us all, may we parents/guardians/aunties/uncles and all in between, encourage and nurture our children/wards to be the best they can be at pretty much any thing they are good at especially if it wouldn’t land them in trouble with their soul or the law hahaha