How much more serene, peaceful and happy will the next 14 days be? See you on the 15th day and thanks for all the wishes. I have faith in the fast, I treasure my treasure so much, and love the path I see in the horizon carefully charted just for me. The entire path may be daunting, the journey initially lonely, the steps shaky – but in God I Trust and believe in Angels…
My sons, my GA and some of you have been so supportive! I am so grateful and carry everyone in my thoughts…
I have given up a lot including my choice to be angry like when someone stepped on my toes at the market, I can’t even raise my voice again anyhow hahaha
I have lost some relationships already, some are now simply put most shallow. That’s the price you pay when you don’t know how to belong or care about what others say, think or do in reaction to your actions be they for personal growth…which they sadly see as selfish, weird or self-absorbed…hush lady enough now, there we go… What did you learn from the movie The Shift by Dr Dyer?
It’ll be ok Son, one day we’ll own a motor bike lol
I will write an entire blog post at the end of this special spiritual journey/fasting, to share my personal experience, the pros and cons of such a profound journey. But let me just state the fact that whenever you decide to do something in life, the ego and the self centered self seek to take center stage and direct you. This will definitely conflict if what you are embarking on is spiritual in nature – for example a fast.
On Wednesday 07/03, the 7th day of stage 1 of this thrilling spiritual journey am on, a conflict arose in the form of how to deal with Gaby’s Shi Shi*. He didn’t want to bathe – inshort he didn’t want to go to school even though they were starting 4th sequence exams that morning. Hod up now, he even wanted to switch education systems again back to French ha. I don’t even know where to start with the merry go round…
I first told him to give me a minute and I went into my loo to pray. I asked for serenity and discernment (Those are the first lines of my personal prayer). There wasn’t much time left. I invited Gaby to come bathe with me (inviting or allowing any of them into the loo my love is a privilege no one wants to ruin), he was calm and started singing as he often does when bathing. I joined in (I hadn’t planned on going out that early nor going for a walk, I wanted to do some small sports once they all left) and sang and danced with him until I realized he was in no haste to leave of course lol.
He said if I should please accompany him to school which was the idea I had anyway. We walked kind of fast (20 mins and not 40 when you don’t hold his hand and he gets to kick pebbles and watch birds hahaha), and by midway he was more mellow and we started to gist. At the school entrance, he met some friends and all was good – bye mummy…
It was then I continued walking taking a longer route, and I stopped by my former landlady (who owns the home where my marital sagas unfolded leading to my fleeing – she knows it all and stepped in a few times God bless Ma Made). Her grand daughter now a young miss, asked after the boys and especially about ‘le petit Alain la’. She still thinks of them like small boys although she is only a year older than Alain now. When I jokingly told her Alain was big and macho and could date her now, Maeva blushed and sad lol like they do. I always check in on Ma Made every now and then because she was simply put awesome to me and us all when we were her tenants.
When I got home, I met David outside (the college guy didn’t have school today because their class finished exams yesterday, and they were asked to stay home for a 3 day break, while Alain finishes today) He was fiddling with the neighbour’s motor bike, and I was taken down memory lane…
Motor Biking 101 in Bxl 2015
Back from my walk and down memory lane
Thanks to Gaby therefore, I had a good 56 minutes walk, I saw Ma made and Maeva (whom I last saw on New Year’s morning), and I sat on the neighbour’s motor bike and went down memory’s lane to a moment in time when I had a length Period of Grace before my relocation back home.
All in all, I didn’t raise my voice nor use a whip, Gaby bathe and went to school not whinning anymore about moving back to french system of education, I did exercise and got even some extra.
When life shows up with some twists, twist yourself around calmly and you may just have fun in the process like I did…
*Shi Shi: local slang in french to mean childish whining or something of the sort
p.s: My friend comes back from school 2 good hours after they closed, he stopped at a friend’s house he slurs. I look at him like that… sigh and say a silent prayer, then I take away 2 of the 3 mangoes I kept for him. He loves mangoes very much, maybe he could learn a lesson from there? I mean he could tell or ask me this morning he wanted to hang out at a friend’s after school; and that’s not even cool to just leave school and go to peoples’ homes like you don’t have one right?
Sharing to inspire and motivate especially parents in the blogosphere – wishing us all loads of patience in dealing with and bringing them kids up
I was seriously walking on my path on day 6 of my purification journey, when Aime my love surprised me with the above snaps as she came back from seeing her son off to school. I had been thinking of the words to a poem titled My Path, and so think these fotos make a good match lol
I remember writing a chapter titled Alain my Treasure in my very first memoir. This Alain in not Alain my son, He was a boyfriend. The relationship over, I moved on to find another treasure. I have dabbled to call two others my treasures again since then before the final enlightenment…
What am I trying to say, we all (at least majority), seek something to cherish here below, to consider our treasure. In yester years, I sought that in men and sex was a good – welcome part of the search. Oh how I blundered and sauntered – strolling miserably through life with no particular direction and near losing my mind…
Could I have so failed to think I could be my own treasure?
And so, when I came to find the one and only true love I could ever truly possess here below; the infinite source from which I could genuinely give to all others on my path; the love that had been buried deep within thanks to all the happenings of life regardless of their source, I couldn’t stop crying.
I AM MY TREASURE! MY SPIRIT, SOUL AND BODY ARE MY TREASURES!
And who am I? I already got the answer to this one, thank God – my source of all…
So, how do I take care of my treasure? In 5 lines shall I?
I keep it healthy and happy; no junk food, thoughts, actions or reactions so help me God;
I keep it clean and free from fear, worry, and all such in between;
I nurture it each and every moment by appreciating it and sharing its shine for in giving we receive;
I commit it to its great purpose as designed by the creator itself – by Grace I have found my path and purpose; even if I still have a long way to go; am in a much much better place and grateful for the purification journey just started.
And how much do I treasure myself, oh I am grateful to be alive – to not have left in 2009 when I picked up that knife– Thank you Lord
Dear all, in the above picture taken on the eve of my purification journey, I was on my way out to a birthday where I ate meat for hopefully my last time. I am a vegetarian now for health and spiritual reasons – and yes because that is good in safeguarding my treasure.
And so this morning for breakfast (day 1 of 3 days break) I fed my treasure the following: Small plate of mixed veggie salad, a bowl of soybean pap with some rice, ginger/turmeric tea with honey and a banana. I make much tea and keep in the flask to drink as needed during the day for my small cold lol
May I therefore encourage you to find yours and take good care of same…
Wow, 1st 3-days break and I am super excited. I will publish 5/6 posts during this break because yes, I missed writing out here – so bear with me gentle followers.
On a more serene note, the above picture was taken on day three of my fast, a Saturday, I was back from the biggest farmers’market in Central Africa – found thankfully in Douala like 30/40 mins away from my home, I bought all that and fixed them all up for the month – or however long we can keep that lol. I worked in that kitchen all day, because I love cooking (big temptation if you are fasting but I had no option and could do that lol), and only left that kitchen at 6 pm. Someone said wow?
So, as I announced last week, I started a spiritual/purification journey of 70 days as guided by my inner compass and this includes a 4 stage fasts with there being a 3 days break in between the stages.
I am fasting from 6 things as directed- and as you can see if you use magnifying glasses lol (food, anger, worry, hate, attack thoughts and yes the last one is sex, so that doesn’t even cross my mind during this period), and to be honest, so far so good. I sincerely evaluate myself 80% and this is an A – Period.
The day started off so cool because it had rained cats and dogs the previous night. I walked Aime’s son to school, well she came along, I worked with my dearest Sahadat (you’ll read about her before stage two begins I promise) from home, talked for long with my son Israel, it’d been such a while and I so love to connect with this full of promise adopted son of mine, and to make my first day so special, another small daughter of mine who was looking to connect with her dad all these years, called me to announce the good news. She is 22 and has never spoken to nor seen her dad. I once helped her zoom trails to find him to no avail. What a first day right?
It takes stubborn but passionate faith to walk such fate especially if any fasting whatsoever is involved. I mean I ate no pin, and tried my very best to fast from the other items. The 20% less is the shaky thoughts because am human of course… but I have faith in the fast… I said I was ready and stand by that…
Let me borrow from my friend Pammie’s view on faith: “faith is not a religious faith…it is trust in life-serving-life” and this is why I am going through this 70 day purification and fasting. I have faith in the outcome.
And so, me thinks, to fast especially in stages and for so long, whatever the motive (be it for health, wealth, weight, or religion prescribed) you need to have faith in the fast. No fast cars involved here, you have to walk your talk.
To, summarize this first post of my first break from my first stage of fasting, I am so grateful for the Grace to fast. The picture below is me that same saturday after working all day. I sate down to a full tray of a balanced diet which included a detox home made juice (smoothie if you want lol) in the red cup, a succulent fresh mango, some fresh tender corn on the cob home cooked of course, a yummy risotto in rice salad style, pap and enough water to fill my thirst tank hahaha. It was not so clear by the time I wrapped all up and freshened up, but the focus should be on my tray and not my face hahaha
So seven days later, here I am trying my best. Happy with the firm implementation of my 3D principles of Determination, Discipline and Dedication. The spiritual fruits are already starting to bud… but that will be fully revealed at the end. I could however treat myself to a hefty dinner and ignore the irritation on my eye and knee cap – guess my body not so pleased with me o
lots of fibres, veggies and sweet mangoes lol
lots of fluids for the eye and running nose
mum, author, mental health advocate, therapist, inspires & motivates with personal experiences
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