I had a meltdown today after 9 months


Hello tribe,Today was so overwhelming and sensorial, I ended up with a meltdown.Today I signed the grant for my association at the US Embassy in my country, and an event which was to be joyful all the way ended up triggering. I really went through the crying and pain in my head, and hands and legs, and I did live videos to capture all that and use that to raise awareness about mental health challenges and Mental illness.So, feeling better now and ready for bed, I just wrote the following on Facebook – does anyone relate or have anything to add which I could capture for more sensitization please?Some Signs someone is struggling mentally:
1) Their speech gets more rapid or slurred;
2) Their gaze gets more distracted or static;
3) Their coherence gets more all over the place or repetitive;
4) They cry for no reason or every reason they recall;
5) They look so untidy or over more than usual…inshort it is on a case by case basis and I am drawing from my own experiences as a mental health care user and providerSome things you can do to help someone struggling
1) Listen to them without offering advice as they speak;
2) let them cry all they want and just run their hand and offer a tissue as you let them know it is ok to cry it out;
3) Ask them what you can do to make them feel better, and try to do that;
4) Help them look at the positive side of life as is without any judgmental tone;
5) Encourage them to lie down or offer to go for a walk with them depending on how they are and what they prefer.Some things not helpful to do when someone is struggling
1) Do not cut them short with solutions unless you know them so well, you may trigger more sadness and helplessness if you do – online comments are different, they may not even read them while the struggle is ongoing;
2) Do not try to blame them or make them feel ungrateful about their struggles;
3) Do not try to get them bottle it up for whatever reason;
4) Do not try to take any major decisions about them without discussing with them (personally I would feel invalidated, hurt and stigmatized);
5) Do not laugh away their struggle.All the above from my personal experiences. I am sincerely grateful for all Angels on my path, and all who continue to trust me to help them too.Goodnight tribe, I feel much better but need to sleep now and not later o. I will be live on national TV tomorrow for the program below

World Mental Health Day 2019, I reflect some…


I have definitely come a long way since opening up about my mental health challenges in 2013, and PTSD diagnosis which followed in 2014. Could it be just 6 years gone? I have come to realize the best way to liberate yourself of the yoke of stigma and shame, face dem phobias and foes, is to #speakyourmind. When you do that, you without knowing give others the permission to relate and #daretohopetoo.

I run an organisation today which at barely 10 months got a US Embassy grant to principally carry out mental health awareness, advocacy and look at what structures could be put in place to facilitate mental well-being. I know there is more to come and to be done.

I share this tweet from the Global Mental Health Peer Network to which I belong too as the executive representing Cameroon, to encourage and motivate us all on this day.

#WMHD2019. Together we can prevent and reduce #suicide rates through – Raise #awareness; Eliminate #stigma; Create #support structures for those suffering; Provide safe spaces to #speak about struggles; Make sure that no one feels alone; Generate #hope! @global_peer

A special shout out to Ashley Peterson who blogs over at Mentalhealth@Home.

This picture reminds me of when I started to consciously hate how my life was playing out back then

The Church and Mental health challenges…could we be more…


Voice of the Voiceless
How can I be silent?

I leave dots after more because I leave it to each one to fill in what they want. I was shaken and yet poked up when I read of the pastor’s suicide. I was also in serious reflections about mental wellness whether you were a christian or not – coincidence or not? World suicide day had just come and gone, and I remember holding a knife to my heart 10 years ago while 5 months pregnant. I wrote several related posts on Facebook about this yesterday and I just saw another article which took me back to thinking about doing this post.

Here is the link to the article I read:

https://www.christianitytoday.com/edstetzer/2019/september/pastor-dies-by-suicide-three-things-we-all-need-to-know.html?share=

Now, I don’t know about out there, but in my country mental health challenges are ‘not welcome in church’ period. Better call them demon possessed attacks or wicked people thrown sorts on you – bottom line is you have to be delivered in church, you have lots of penance to do and …

With me being so vocal about my mental health challenges and my PTSD diagnosis from 2014, I quickly learned when I joined church that it’s not so welcome to be vocal – about that and about pretty much – like Rape. I am contemplating if I can swim in such a sea or if I have to leave for real.

So, will this suicide by a pastor cause the ‘church’ to become more…open, real, compassionate, and you can go on; or will they quickly dissociate from the victim pastor, finding reasons to show he was perhaps a ‘fake’ pastor after all?

We’ll see how it goes…in the meantime let’s remember #mentalhealthmatters

The Increase in Child Rape: Cases in our Society (What do we do?)


Yesterday 25.04.19, I was a guest on a power program on HiTv called Girls’ Talk, hosted by the talented Wilson Blessing in the city of Buea, Cameroon.

We were looking at the Increase in Child Rape in our society and we had other expert resource persons like Prof Teke of the University of Buea and Dr Forbellah a partner with Doctors without borders. I was brought in in different capacities, and discussed different aspects of rape which could be leading to its increase in our society regardless of all we cry against.

Interesting pannelAs a lawyer, I looked at the shortcomings of the provisions in the penal code and how undettering they were to perpetrators. As a Psychotherapist, I looked at the life time trauma of victims/survivors. As a parent, I looked at our plight, role and responsibilities.

All about HopeAs the founder of the Association Hope for the Abused and Battered, I used some specific cases we have addressed so far to drive home my points that there is a lot needed to be done by our collective Synergies. You mustn’t wait until your child or family member is raped before you speak up. It was a thrilling day. Visit our website at www.hope4abusedbattered.com, email us at hope@hope4abusedbattered.com
#itispossible
#thereishope
#BetheHope
#rapenotruined
#togetherwestrong
#Iamfreedomnlove
#hope4theabusednbattered
#attitudeofgratitude

Clinical depression is no death sentence


A Mental illness is not a death sentence. Clinical depression can only last that long. Joe is 38 and is ok with the world knowing he has been struggling with his mental health for 4 years and lost touch recently. But, #thereishope. I received him at the Integration Clinic Bonamousadi Douala Cameroon yesterday and he was hospitalised for a closer follow up and holistic treatment approach.

Ekema is a peer diagnosed with Schizophrenia 25 years ago and living with me since June 2018. He is doing so well now and is
working at the Hope for the Abused and Battered center currently running from home. He came to visit Joe and reassure him all will be well. Visit us at http://www.hope4abusedbattered.com

After Joe took a bath (hadn’t had one for days prior)

#notostigma
#mentalhealthiswealth
#mentalillness
#BetheHope
#Iamfreedomnlove